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Articles: Humour | HUMOUR
- Prof. venkata ramanamurty mallajosyula
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1.what did dentist say to the Judge?
I’ll pull the tooth, but the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth.
2.Why are some girls like salad?
Because they need lot of dressing.
3.What can run and whistle but can neither walk nor talk?
Locomotive.
4.A woman had 5 children. Half of them were boys. How could it be?
The other half were boys too.
5.Where is English channel ?
Not to my TV set?
6.What starts with t ends with t and is full of t ?
Teapot
7.Why doesn’t Saint Nicholas shave?
Every time he tries , he nicks himself.
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DAFYYNISHIONS
Bacteria : A rear of a cafeteria
Chidren: Small people who are not permitted to act the way their parents did at that age.
Circle : Around straight line with a hole in the middle.
Depth : Height turned up side down.
Editor: A literary barber.
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Phony Finales
Napoleon last words Make mine a short bier.
Composer’s last words: The Bach stops here.
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Mother: What are you jumping up and down for, Paul?
Paul:I took my medicine and forgot to shake the bottle.
Aunt (to a Niece ) : When I was little, my mother told me that if I made an ugly face, it would stay that way.
Niece : Well, Auntie, You can’t say you weren’t warned.
Davy : This dog of mine is a police dog.
Dana : He doesn’t look like a police dog.
Davy : I know, he is in secret service.
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Tongue twisters
1.The sun shines on the shop signs.,
2.Criss crossing cautiously.
3.She sawed six slick sleek, slim, slender saplings.
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Genius on test:
Get your friend to read this slowly.
I am fond of fastidious reader who called for necessary perfection during scientific years of study.
Now, tell him to say the count of “f”s in the sentence.
If he says 3 f’s, tell him to join the crowd.4 f’s can find him in the above average group and 5 f’s can make him pluck his pince-nez. If he says 6, then tell him why is he spending time over a silly test.” Go Boy, you are great!”
-Prof. Venkata Ramanamurty Mallajosyula
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