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I completely agree with vikram. He is almost right in all the points he mentioned. Even it is sour for the girls to accept these facts, these are right in all respects. Most of the girls expect their partner to be rich and they select that person. They even expect that we guys have to marry them with out expecting any financial back up. If we ask some support they blame us for that. mee avasaram maaku entha vundho maa avasaram kooda meeku anthe vundhi. I dont know why they forget this. Money plays a vital role to run the life. Love and affection will not fill the stomach. I dont mean that every body should bring back up. If they really doesnt have, we will never insist. When they have, we definitely expect. Afterall its for our well being and smooth running of our life. Isnt it. Just think. I am sorry if i hurt any body's feelings with my comments. Its my thought what i had shared with you all. regards srinu

Posted by: Mr. Srinivas rao V At: 22, Jul 2002 2:24:22 PM IST

i partially agree with vikram if you see the trend in the AP girls are only in fond of going to usa i want to listenm from them who really don't bu taking dowry is not good practice b cos we not a dolls with some education qualifications and money so taht we can sell our selfs people are marrying for emotional needs not for money this trend is not good

Posted by: Mr chandrasekhar kuricherla pati At: 21, Jul 2002 2:47:57 PM IST

Ms jyothy, Thats what.The girls parents dont marry off their daughter not only to the richest man.They look for a lot more things.But they try to marry their daughter to a guy with all the qualities they like who is also rich, if not the richest. I dont think that the girls parents dont look for money.Thats one of the most important thing they look for.As a matter of fact it is a priority above the looks of the guy.As you said they look for family bg,education and behavior of the guy + how much he earns or how much is behind him.Dont tell me it is not the case.Because I know it is.Ask anybody to make things clear(If you dont believe me). I never told they blindly marry the richest guy.I just told its one of the most imp things that girls look for.Please dont misinterpret my views. Sorry once again for being rude.But that was just a reselliance to what Ms Swapna did.

Posted by: Mr. Vikram Ekollu At: 20, Jul 2002 9:16:58 PM IST

oooooooooooooh, Mr.Vikram i think that was rude. Lets make attempts to make this a healthy discussion and lets all mind our language pl. Otherwise people will be put off and not participate if it turns like this. Yes,one example of some girl looking for 100k does not make her personigy all the women in the world. Vikram there are different people with different characters and tempraments and ambitions.In the example you gave,I feel the girl was ambitiuos. But generally,a girl/girl's parents do not look only for money.It is not that parents marry of their daughters to the richest match that comes for their daughters.They also see family background,education,culture and the boy's education and behaviuor which would be suitable for their daughter. don't make it sound like all the girls blindly marry the richest match that comes their way beacuse I didn't and most of the people I know didn't.

Posted by: Mrs. jo Jyothy At: 20, Jul 2002 7:08:18 PM IST

Hi Vikram, Seems this discussion/Debet turns out to be a war room. Here you have started with the issue of "dowry" and issue lead to a nasty turnout. Here you gave freedom to all to present their feelings and inner thoughts regarding "dowry". We should really appriciate that you are keen in communicating all and responding very positively, but lost your control with our friends comment(s). Regarding tastes and choices, cannot blame either sex (M/F). When a bride look for 100k salary earning groom. Dont u consider groom looking for well educated, wealthy and good looking bride. Why groom is not marrying a middle class girl? when we look for rich girl, obviously her tastes are rich and might. If your friend would have considered poor girl(atleat middle class lady), he never undergone this humiliating situation. Let us focus on the transaction of money (dowry), here every one are positive against dowry. But every one like to take "dowry" here both ladies and gentlemen are to be blamed, and due to poverty this evil never die. Never ending topic. Keen to read more peoples views in this :-)) let see how it proceed. Cheers

Posted by: Mr. Kesava Kumar Grandhi At: 20, Jul 2002 4:36:24 PM IST

hello this is one of the topic that never comes with the conclusion.everyone face their own unique experience at that stage.i respect others feelings.urs logic is correct if we think from one corner,i mean from guys but i think its different from gals point of view.what do you say?

Posted by: Mr. Ashok Chowdary At: 20, Jul 2002 10:04:25 AM IST

Hi Ms Swapna, Dont give me some crap.Try to think about what I have said.If you cant just leave it alone.You just cant make some statements and ask everybody to take it for an axiom. Let me narrate you an incident.It was posted on this very website. One of my friend is working in USA with excellent job. he was very near to get Green card also. he was getting 70k salary. He wanted to marry. his parents saw a girl. and they were very impressed about the gal and family and they were not intrested in dowry. The guy wanted to talk with the gal for few mins. They started talking. After some time she asked him about his salary. He said 70k. her immediate reply was "it would be better if it is 100k". He was shocked. Because 70k is very very good salary in USA. Your decision of marriage..does it hold only for males.Aren't females who look for more qualified and a more richer husband bitches(If you think we are gigolos).Let me ask you,If you aren't already married wouldn't you want your husband to be a rich man.Then are you a -----.If you are already married..didn't you see how much he was earning before you married him? Dont be stupid and bang and shout at something you dont like just because you are at the recieving end.Try to give it a thought before you let out the beast in you. Sorry for the kind of Language I'm using.You forced me to do it. And you have people who endorse your ugly,vulgar statements.Talk to them in private and have a nice time chatting.Please dont go public with this sort of language. You will immediately take the stick like you are doing now.

Posted by: Mr. Vikram Ekollu At: 20, Jul 2002 3:09:12 AM IST

Hi Swapna, Well said. I see you reacting the same way I did reading Vikram's Essay.I felt the same outburst at the twisted logic in his essay and the way he seems to be justifying the act of taking dowry if its an arranged marriage. I really such people for their poor opinion on marriage and women.

Posted by: Mrs. jo Jyothy At: 20, Jul 2002 1:58:37 AM IST

swapna garu, I doubt it if u have read my first paragraph..I know this is a discussion about dowry .I have put my view totally in a different manner which I think u had mistaken. My first paragraph "I did not read other discussions just saw the topic and thought...well I got some positive feelings in my own way. This dowry system as far as I know..if the given dowry is usefull for the woman which is given by her parents,its well and good on 1 side...on the other side if the dowry is forced to be given by her parents it's not a good thing." If the soo called dowry is not forced to be given by the girls parents according to my view...I dont think u'r soo called dowry rates and dowry "DEATHS" would increase in A.P.... Giving to their own children is part of the culture too..if u have noticed...(according to their own ability,for their own good).That's what I meant in my previous comments.I don't think this can be changed in the comeing million years. Here I have supported the support given to their own daughter not DOWRY for u'r information.Hope u get u'r answer somewhere else.

Posted by: Mrs. jaya k At: 19, Jul 2002 7:13:44 PM IST

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