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Articles: My Thoughts | | Is it a Sin to take Dowry in all Cases? | |
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| Ms Samatha,
This is surprising.I used think nobody agreed with what I said even though I had a point just because nobody was ready to accept the truth.
I really admire your honesty for endorsing my views.Now I am confident that what I was thinking was not wrong.Thank you.
Posted by: Mr. Vikram Ekollu At: 13, Jul 2002 9:20:46 PM IST
hi,
i read all comments.so good expalnations.keep it up.i like samtha's expalnation also.being a girl she is thinking the truth .that doesnt mean i support dowry.but good comments.like to see more from u guys and girls...
sreeni
Posted by: Mr. M.S.Reddy At: 13, Jul 2002 2:06:43 PM IST
I support Mr Vikram....
In the kind of environment I grew, the kind of marriages I saw.... the girl has always been placed in a better family than she was brought up.
Look there is difference when we talk about the dowry 30 years back and now. some years back the responsibilites of wife & husband were seen different to those of the present society.
Till recently a wife is expected to work for the harmony in family. And the money matters are expected to be handled by the husband. so obviously the wife used to have less say in those matters.
But now, how many of the girls are ready to live in the model stated above? (Not me ofcouse :-)). THe girls with whom I have been moving, everyone needs money for their own personal reasons (they dont want to ask someone for every penny), they need status for what they are.....and existence in the society. Thus money has entered the minds of people. They too start working. so the model reduced to 'make money .. spend money '. Making money is the new responsibility that the wife has to perform. whether its by working or by dowry ... (you see, there is reduction in dowry if the girl works). Belive me, the money given as dowry doesn't go waste..it always remains with girl. If its property these days no parent is registering in the name of 'son in laws' and if bridegrooms parents are sensible enough,even the cash, they are doing fixed deposits on name of girl. what is the girl really loosing????
personally, except in movies && newspapers I haven't come across the so called 'dowry harassment'.
Posted by: Ms Samatha G At: 13, Jul 2002 11:47:33 AM IST
Mr. Chowdary,
Forgot to ask you one thing. I may need the services of my wife later in my life. Don't you think my wife may need my services too? It's possible. So this is not a proper criterion to be considered. Nobody knows who may need who's services.
Posted by: Mr. Vikram Ekollu At: 13, Jul 2002 3:32:50 AM IST
Mr. Chowdary,
yeah ur logic is nearly flawless. I don't mean to say dowry is a bigger priority than character, beauty, etc. All these things(character, beauty, etc.) are sought not only by guys but also girls. In addition to these things girls also look how well her would be is settled in life. What is it guys are to look for in this regard?
Give it a thought.
Posted by: Mr. Vikram Ekollu At: 13, Jul 2002 3:29:32 AM IST
Good luck for your future happy married life! we both are facing 180 degrees. Its very hard to change people attitute and I dont want to waste my time in changing yours. I only hope that you and your future wife will be happy!
Posted by: Mr. Sasidhar Gundimeda At: 13, Jul 2002 2:31:09 AM IST
Mr Chowdary,
I agree with you.But only in part. Marriage is a mutual understanding. Once you are married everything you said is true.
But before marriage when the gal is looking at so many things what should guys look at.
Is any girl happy to marry a guy who just earns enough to make both the ends meet.No. They want more.So do we. It is definitely materialism. But you cant complain just abt dowry. Also think abt girls who set high targets.
Posted by: Mr. Vikram Ekollu At: 13, Jul 2002 2:30:59 AM IST
Dear admin,
Could you please allow a preview of the comments before we post them.I made a typographical error in the first sentence and I can no longer correct it.
Thank you,
Vikram
Posted by: Mr. Vikram Ekollu At: 13, Jul 2002 2:23:10 AM IST
Mr Sasidhar,
Your questions make me lol.Anyway here are my answers..
1)I am just talikng about what is to be done before marriage.After any kind of if something goes wrong and it breaks, everything is back to square one. All the conditions still hold.
2)I dont have an answer to this stupid question.I haven't heard or read of such a thing.Do you have any idea abt something called blood relation.Its means you are related by blood and you are not strangers.You dont marry a girl who is a criminal(u know what i wanna say). But you are not going to desert your parents etc if he/she is a criminal.Your parents are not strangers. Its a shame to call your parents strangers.
3)Once again how can you compare ur parents to ur wife?
In both the above cases I dont have a choice of choosing my parents.So the ones I got are the greatest.In case of wife.I have a choice.So I'll pick the best one(I can get) in all aspects.
4)Did I say that everybody will be at my fet,If I dont marry her? Looks like you dont understand english. I will marry whom I want to marry if she is willing to. I know how good I am and how much to expect. If I expect more than what I deserve, I have to make a compromise some where in the run.
5)Please take time to read something you want to comment on.I told that anybody has to prove it oneway or the other.(cash or heart) and my girl proved it somehow. How she did is not something you need to know.
Posted by: Mr. Vikram Ekollu At: 13, Jul 2002 2:20:52 AM IST
Mr. Site Administrator,
We know that! When you give this kind of statements, it will surely discourage people not to express their views openly.
Already Indians are cowards, they wont open thier mouth, who are scared to death thinking that a gun from computer will shoot them if they express thier true opinions. If you give this kind of advice, they will piss in thier pants! If this is what you want, you can force people not to talk!
After all this is your website! You can do what ever you want!
Sasidhar.
Posted by: Mr. Sasidhar Gundimeda At: 12, Jul 2002 9:43:01 PM IST
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