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Articles: Humour | Ramayana in terms of IT!
- Venkat Kadiyala
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| LAN, LAN ago, in the SYSTEM of I/O-dhya, there ruled a PROCESSOR named DOS-rat. Once he EXECUTED a great sacrifice PROGRAM after which his queens gave an OUTPUT of four SUNs--RAM, LSIman, BUG-rat and SED-rughana.
RAM the eldest was a MICROCHIP with excellent MEMORY. His brothers, however, were only PERIPHERAL ICs. Once when RAM was only 16MB, he married princess 'C'ta. 12 years passed and DOS-rat decided to INSTALL RAM as his successor.
However, Queen CIE/CAE(Kaykayee), who was once offered a boon by DOS-rat for a lifesaving HELP COMMAND, took this opportunity at the instigation of her BIOSed maid (a real plotter), and insisted that her son Bug-rat be INSTALLED and that RAM be CUT-N-PASTED to the forest for 14 years.
At this cruel and unexpected demand, a SURGE passed through DOS-rat and he collapsed, power-less. RAM agreed to LOG INTO forest and 'C'ta insisted to LOGIN with him. LSI-man also resolved on LOGGING IN with his brother.
The forest was the dwelling of SPARCnakha, the TRAN-SISTOR of RAW-van, PROCESSOR of LAN-ka. Attracted by RAM's stature, she proposed that he should marry her. RAM politely declined. Perceiving 'C'ta to be the SOURCE CODE of her distress, she hastened to kill her.
Weeping, SPARC-nakha fled to LAN-ka, where RAW-van, moved by TRAN-SISTOR's plight, approached his uncle MAR-icha. MAR-icha REPROGRAMMED himself into the form of a golden stag and drew RAM deep into the forest. Finally, tired of chase, RAM shot the deer, which, with his last breath, cried out desperately for LSI-man in RAM's voice.
Fooled by this VIRTUAL RAM SOUND, 'C'ta urged LSI-man to his brother's aid. Taking the opportunity, RAW-van DELINKED 'C'ta from her LIBRARY and changed her ROOT DIRECTORY to LAN-ka.
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INTERVAL
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RAM and LSI-man started SEARCHING for the missing 'C'ta all o ver the forest. They made friendship with the forest SYSTEM ADMINISTRATOR SU-greev and his powerful co-processor Ha-NEUMAN. SU-greev agreed to help RAM. SU-greev ordered his PROGRAMMERS to use powerful 'SEARCH' techniques to FIND the missing 'C'ta.
His PROGRAMMERS SEARCHED all around the INTER-NETworked forests. Many tried to 'EXCITE' the birds and animals not to forget the 'WEBCRAWLERS' (Insects) and tried to 'INFO SEEKB' something about'C'ta.
Some of them even shouted'YAA-HOO' but they all ended up with 'NOT FOUND MESSAGES'. Several other SEARCH techniques proved useless.
Ha-NEUMAN devised a RISKy TECHNOLOGY and used it to cross the seas at an astonishing CLOCK SPEED. Soon Ha-NEUMAN DOWNLOADED himself into LAN-ka. After doing some local SEARCH, Ha-NEUMAN found 'C'ta weeping under a TREE STRUCTURE Ha-NEUMAN used a LOGIN ID(ring) to identify himself to 'C'ta. After DECRYPTING THE KEY, 'C'ta believed him and asked him to send a 'STATUS_OK' MESSAGE to RAM.
Meanwhile all the raakshasa BUGS around 'C'ta, captured Ha-N EUMAN and tried to DELETE him using pyro-techniques. But H! a-NEUMAN managed to spread chaos by spreading the VIRUS 'Fire'.
Ha-NEUMAN happily pressed ESCAPE from LAN-ka and conveyed all the STATUSMESSAGES to RAM and SU-greev. RAW-wan decided to take the all powerful RAM head-on and prepared for the battle. One of the RAW-wan's SUN (son) almost DELETED RAM & LSI-man with a powerful brahma-astra.
But Ha-NEUMAN resorted to some ACTIVE-X gradients and REFORMATTED RAM and LSI-man. RAM used the SOURCE CODE secrets of RAW-wan and once for all wiped out RAW-wan's presence on earth.
After the battle, RAM got INSTALLED in I/O-dhya and spread his MICROSOFT WORKS and other USER FRIENDLY PROGRAMS to all USERS and every one lived happily ever after.
Regards,
Venkat.
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