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Articles: Humour | Let us play 'Statue'
- Prof. 00782 Maverick
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Let us play 'Statue'
A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.
'Hurry!' she said, 'Stand in the corner.' She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder.
'Don't move until I tell you to.' she whispered. 'Just pretend you're a statue.'
'What's this, honey?' the husband asked as he entered the room. 'Oh, it's just a statue.' she replied nonchalantly. 'The Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I saw it the last time I stayed with them when you were on your office trip to New York. I liked the idea so much, I got one for us, too.'
No more was said about the 'statue'.
Later that night when they went to sleep. Around two in the morning the husband got out of bed, went into the kitchen, and returned with a sandwich and a glass of milk.
'Here.' he said to the 'statue'. 'Eat this. I stood like an idiot at the Smiths for three days and no one offered me so much as a glass of water.'
A Strange Man in My Bedroom?
A guy dials his home phone number from work. A strange woman answers.
The guy says, 'Who is this?'
'This is the maid.' answered the woman. 'We don't have a maid!'
'I was just hired this morning by the lady of the house.'
'Well this is her husband. Is she there?'
'Ummmm...she's upstairs in the bedroom with someone who i just figured was her husband.'
The guy is fuming. He says to the maid, 'Listen, would you like to make $50,000?'
'What do I have to do?'
'I want you go get my gun from my desk in the den and shoot that witch and the jerk she's with.'
The maid puts down the phone. The guy hears footsteps, followed by a couple of gunshots.
The maid comes back to the phone. 'What should I do with the bodies?'
'Throw them in the pool!'
'What? There is no pool here!!'
Long pause..
'Uh..is this 832-4821?'
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