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Articles: Humour | 'What is 2 + 2 ?' - Saleem
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Here were the responses from the experts:
Accountant: '2 + 2 = 4.45, with GST and PST included.'
Lawyer: Shuts all the doors and windows, glances back and
forth, then whispers, 'Well what do you want it to be?'
Politician: 'What does the poll say?'
Doctor: 'I once memorized the answer before and I think it's 4. Wait, or was that 1 + 3? Nope, 3 + 1? 2 * 2? Hmm, I'm not sure. Looks like I'll have to dig out the Medical Handbook. Excuse me...'
Psychiatrist: 'The answer is negative 4 or positive 4 depending on your mood swing.'
Physicist: Goes and performs the most complicated calculations
using the Theory of Relativity, and announces:
'2 + 2 = pi plus or minus pi.'
Civil Engineer: 'About 5.'
(And this is why all engineers now have to wear an iron ring.)
Electrical Engineer: 'Where's my @#* calculator? '
Mathematician: Cogitates for a while, completely oblivious to the rest of the world, then returns with his hair all tangled up
and declares, 'I don't know the answer but I can prove that the solution exists and converges.'
Chemist: Goes and mixes solutions of red, green, and yellow together which results in a series of explosions; does some calculations and announces, 'At room temperature, 2 + 2 = 3.1 plus or minus 5 parts per million. Hold on... that doesn't seem right...hmm...'
Biologist: 'The question doesn't make sense: you can't cross two inorganic things together...'
Philosopher: 'Gentlemen, the question is not 'WHAT is 2 + 2' but
'WHY is 2 + 2' '
Archeologist: '2 + 2 is between 10000 and 20000 using carbon dating technique.'
Historian: 'Gentlemen, this is a historic moment. We're on the
verge of making history So what's the answer gonna be?'
(Everyone ignores him and goes on with the debate.)
Computer Programmer: 'This is a very difficult problem. Let me
write a program to solve it.' He goes and writes a
program and executes it. The output reads:
'2 + 2 is... Segmentation fault. Core dump.'
Windows 95 Programmer: The program output reads:
'2 + 2 is... Please wait...'
Unix Programmer: Goes and writes a program called '2plus2' with the command syntax:
2plus2 -n1 first_number -n2 second_number -o operation
YY-pPq Y-r ! -st output_format Y-l landscape ! -p
portrait Y-R round_up_digits Y-l Yo ! n
Optimization Y-B Yb ! d ! x ! o base_radix Y-i$
iterations Y-gYx ! y graphic_output
Y-fn filename Y-t batch_job Y-bp beep Y-r randomize
Y-g guess Y-h hog_CPU Y-a abort
Upon execution, the output reads:
'Bad command. Not enough arguments.'
Economist: Draws a graph projection of the result over the 1985 - 1999 period which looks like this:
10 + oooo o
! o o o oo o
! o o o o o
sum (2+2) 5 +o oo o oooo
! o o o
! ooo
0 +---------+---------+---------+
Year: '85 '90 '95 '99
** 1985-1999 World Projection of (2+2) Assuming
** Stable World Economy and 4.5% Annual Inflation Rate
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