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Articles: Humour | More about IT and Windows
- Mr. Visweswar Zesty
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'The only truly secure computer is one buried in concrete, with the power turned off and the network cable cut.'
'Old lie — The check is in the mail.
New lie — I didn't check the e-mail.' — Brian Fine.
'First we thought the PC was a calculator. Then we found out how to turn numbers into letters with ASCII — and we thought it was a typewriter. Then we discovered graphics, and we thought it was a television. With the World Wide Web, we've realized it's a brochure.' — Douglas Adams (1952—2001)
'The definition of an upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.'
'Evolution is God's way of issuing upgrades.'
'The only problem with troubleshooting is that sometimes trouble shoots back.'
'Each new user of a new system uncovers a new class of bugs.' — Kernighan.
'If it's not on fire, it's a software problem.'
'Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live.' — Martin Golding.
'Never test for an error condition you don't know how to handle.' — Steinbach's Guideline for Systems Programmers.
'Sometimes it pays to stay in bed on Monday, rather than spending the rest of the week debugging Monday's code.' — Christopher Thompson.
'My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.'
'Programming is like sex: one mistake and you're providing support for a lifetime.' — Michael Sinz
'There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third one works.' — Alan J. Perlis.
'Double your drive space — delete Windows !' — Bumper sticker.
'If you don't know where you want to go, we will make sure you get there.' — Microsoft slogan translated in Japanese.
'In a world without walls and fences, who needs Windows and Gates ?' — Dino Esposito.
'Measuring programming progress by lines of code is like measuring aircraft building progress by weight.' — Bill Gates.
'I like my web servers just like my women... insecure and full of holes waiting to be exploited.' — B. G.
'Microsoft is not the answer. Microsoft is the question. NO is the answer.' — Erik Naggum.
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