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Articles: Time Pass | Cowism
- Mr. Manas bodhi
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Advaniism
You have two cows. You dont milk them. You worship them.
Chandrababuism
You have two cows in Vijayawada. You hook them to internet
and milk them from Hyderabad.
Jayalalithaism
You have two cows. You teach them to cry,
'Ammmmaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...'
and fall at your feet.
Karunanidhiism
You have two cows. You give one to your son and the other to
your nephew.
Gandhism
You have two cows. But you drink goat's milk.
Indiraism
You have two bulls. You adamantly consider them as cows.
Lalooism
You have two cows. You buy Rs. 900 Crores worth of cattle
feed for them.
Rajnikantism
You have two cows. You throw them into air and catch their
milk in your mouth.
Rajivism
You have two cows. You paint them both to get colourful milk.
Vajpayeeism
You have two cows. You distribute the milk among your partners
and you eat cattle-feed.
Veerappanism
You have two cows. You take over a reserved forest to feed
them.
Azharism
You have only one cow. You take money from bookies to
maintain it.
Bushism
You have as many cows as you like. You preach to others not to
have any.
Clintonism
You have two cows. But you milk your neighbours' cows.
Musharrafism
Nawaz Sharif has two cows. Take them over.
UNism
You have two cows. You dont milk them; you only lecture to
them.
Socialism:
You have two cows and you give one to your neighbour.
Communism:
You have two cows; the Government takes both and gives you
some milk.
Fascism:
You have two cows; the Government takes both and sells you
some milk.
Nazism:
You have two cows; the Government takes both and shoots you.
Bureaucratism:
You have two cows; the Government takes both, shoots one,
milks the other and throws the milk away.
Traditional Capitalism:
You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd
multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire
on the income.
An American Corporation:
You have two cows. You sell one and force the other to
produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to
analyze why the cow dropped dead.
A French Corporation:
You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three
cows.
A Japanese Corporation:
You have two cows. You redesign and re-engineer them so
that they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce
twenty times more milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon
image called Cowkimon and market them worldwide
A German Corporation:
You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for
100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
A British Corporation:
You have two cows. Both are mad.
An Italian Corporation:
You have two cows, but you do not know where they are. You
break for lunch.
A Russian Corporation:
You have two cows. You count them and learn that you have
five cows. You count them again and learn you have 32 cows. You
count them again and learn you have only two cows. You stop counting
cows and open a bottle of vodka.
A Chinese Corporation:
You have two cows. You have 200 people milking them. You
claim full employment, high bovine productivity and arrest the
news reporter who published the facts.
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