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Articles: My Thoughts | Who is responsible for Whom?
- Mrs. manjari
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Friends, we come across so many incidents in day today world crime, suicides and love problems and many more. Here I just would like to bring in a bit of analysing power to girls or boys who get entangled in affairs with opposite sex. Generally a boy and a girl see each other in college or somewhere and they get attracted to each other in the first instance. Say it is beauty or personality or anything which may be mutually liked. Later on if both the parties make efforts, they get into friendships and then a feeling comes that they can not live their life without being together. So we call it Love and if both the parties are genuine and if there are not objections from elders in some lucky cases they get married. If not, in many cases, they do not go so further. Reasons can be many. In some cases, boys take advantage of the gullible nature of the girls and once they get what they wanted, they will go for another, because very few people (here it can be either the girl or boy) stick to
the genuine principles of love. Generally if it is just physical attraction, it will fade with the passing of time. When two individuals start living together problems can crop up. Here, what I want to stress is to think twice before wasting your time on these things when your precious time should be used in studies and building your career. I am not saying that Love when it can be born and for whom is not in anyone's hands. But For God's sake do not go to extremes by committing suicide if the other person ditches you or if you are not able to carry along. After all this life is so precious. When people with HIV problems and many more calamities are making their living a noteworthy thing, when God has given everything to you, Please use your brain and do not give your life so easily for someone who may not deserve it. For some Love is just a playway thing. Here many girls get cheated. So, when a boy is crossing the limit, then only you should restrain yourself going further, unless untill you are sure about your further steps. What provoked me to write this is I am seeing many guys running after young and beautiful girls and it is like a gamble for them these days. First of all try to see whether the boy or the girl has some basic understanding of core values like giving respect to our family culture and truthful and faithfulness. It is not easy to understand anyone with just few meetings or by few internet meetings. Unless we see them, we do not know for a considerable time period, whether they are genuine in what they and do. So, please be wise and before you take any drastic step, you should think 'what next'? Here I would like to quote one incident I came across. One of our known family girls who was really good looking and brought up in a traditional way was approached by a boy in the office and number of times he proposed to her. Waht happened between them we do not know exactly. The girl never told anything in the house. She got married with the guy chosen by elders and was happy with her husband and was carrying. Then this guy out of jealousy started writing letters to this girl and created suspicion in her husband and that girl committed suicide and she was carrying at that time. Do you think any boy if he had really loved her would create problems in her marriage? It is the wicked human nature.
Now When I went to India I realised the youngsters are moving on the fast track. They drink, they smoke and go to clubs. I am not saying that it is not good. But we are getting westernised. But westerners I see take it easy to break relationships so easily. But Indians, especially women once they heartily like the person and tie the knot can not generally let it go so easily. They try to adjust and bear with all the problems with the sole intention of keeping the marriage lasting throughout life. Especially when the Love affairs are inter-caste and beyond Regions, sometimes the problems which will crop up after marriage are many. No one can foresee them when they just hang around parks and cinema halls. Real life problems will crop up when the boy becomes dominant and tells the girl that she is married now and should obey his family practices and rules. It is often seen. I am not discouraging youngsters. I am just warning you. If you make a decision, please anticipate these things and also think of proper solutions before taking biggest decisions of life. These days parents have given so much freedom to the children, and Children should not mis-use it. Ultimately who is the most affected? As you sow, so you reap. So, take your own time and think twice before jumping into decisions.
So,Youngsters, be careful when you are moving in this fast technological internet world, many more cheates you can come across. Here please do not misunderstand. I am also not excluding girls doing the same to boys these days. But less in number. Changing times. So my advise to youngsters is to be very cautious when you make friendship and go ahead further in having relationships with unknown people especially. God has given life to do many more useful things. Recently, I was so touched and inspired to see an young girl in Fizi who does not have hands has develped her artistic skills using her foot. She does so many things with her foot even watering plants and paintings and other things. She is happy with what she has. Then people who are blessed by God with everything in life, should try to use them in a proper way. Think in a constructive and positive way. Never go to extremes. It is quite but natural in life 'We wont get everything in a way we like'. Somewhere I read 'Life is not peaches and cream, nor sunshine and dreams, A Tear Today and a Smile Tomorrow'. So take the things in their stride and swim across to reach your shores with vigour and skill. Never despair for anything or for anyone. Even if bad happens think that 'Everything is for our own good. and God has something better in store for me'. It will give us positive energy to live life to its fullest extent. As a grown up person with family I feel that I should try to tell youngsters what I can. Hope you understand. Good Luck to all of you.
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