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Articles: My Thoughts | Stress Management
- Mr. Raghu Tallam
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I attended a “Stress Management” seminar by one of the very famous neuro-surgeons of Bangalore on 17 Auhust 2003 in our company (Intel Tech India Pvt. Ltd, Bangalore). It was a 1 hr session and was indeed great. He gave such a lovely talk and I thought I would share it with you. - raghu Tallam
He started his talk by narrating a surgery he had done this morning. A lady surgeon had met with an accident while traveling in an auto rickshaw. The auto had overturned after hitting onto a water pipe on the road. There has been some damage to her spine and she cannot move her hands or her feet. And what good is a surgeon if she cannot use her hands!!! She lost her husband a month back and has a small baby.
The speaker then told us that we think we are the most stressed out, most unlucky people on earth. We never value what we have unless we lose it. We never realize we have teeth until we get a toothache....we never realize we are healthy until we are unwell..... ALWAYS WEAR AN ATTITUDE OF GRATTITUDE. Be grateful for all the blessings you have received. You can never be grateful and miserable at the same time.
Any new project you start, always invoke divine providence. The success of any project has 3 types of obstacles -1. Divine obstacles, 2. Worldly obstacles, 3. Self Obstacles (the negative thoughts – “I know this will not work out” , “I know that I cannot succeed”, “Even this person has failed then how can I succeed”....).
What does man want the most? – Peace and happiness. Then he asked us “Is it possible to carry water in a sieve?” Most of us answered “No” . But he said “You can. Solidify the water into ice and it is possible. Look at problems in different ways. Think. What ever situation you maybe in, you can find peace within yourself.” He narrated a story from the life of Jesus Christ. Jesus was in a boat with His disciples when a heavy storm hit the sea. The water was very turbulent and the boat was about to capsize but Jesus was having a sound sleep. His disciples were so anxious and they woke Him up. Jesus got up and told the sea –“Peace. Be Calm”. Then the doctor told us –“Always when you are very restless or anxious, keep telling yourself ‘Peace. Be Calm’”
There are 5 zones in a man’s life
1. Intimate Zone
2. Family Zone
3. Work Zone
4. Social Zone
5. Spiritual Zone
If you went to the gym instructor and told him I want to build up only my right biceps, at the end of the month, you would look deformed. In the same manner growth in only one zone will lead to an imbalanced life. And you need to grow in each of these zones equally and remember effortlessly. To lead a stress free life, you need to have a balance between all the zones.
How do you know you are stressed out? ---there is no measuring scale that rates your stress level. The best person who can answer this question is your own self. Stress is not only when you are facing a tough situation. Any emotion change be it happy or sad is stress. When you are happy/ sad do not bundle it inside you...cry it out...laugh it out.
Remember that your greatest strength can also turn out to be the reason for your defeat. This statement he substantiated by giving an example – The purpose of the skull is to protect the delicate brain. As a neuro surgeon, he came across a case where the hard skull led to the death of a person the reason being “the skull was very strong”.
Exercise daily. This helps you remain young and energetic.
Love – The relation between a Father and his daughter..... between a Mother and her son.....
Love comes with a virus, with a bug....”POSSESSIVENESS”. A perfect example is “Mother and Son”...Mother loves her son so much that she looks for the best girl in the world to be her son’s bride. But once she realizes that her son is giving more attention to his wife....”the virus“attacks and the “mother-in-law Vs daughter-in-law” battle begins.
These are some of the books he asked us to read:
Man’s Search for Meaning – Victor E. Frankl
The prayer of the Frog
Still Me – Christopher Reeve.
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