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Articles: Humour | ENT Surgeon / Gynaecologist
- Prof. 00782 Maverick
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Now the patient looked confused. 'Do I have to take my husband's permission? Because if you need his sign, he is working in Dubai. We were not able to meet for the last one year.'
It was my turn to be shocked. I gave a sly smirk. It was one of 'those' cases. The pin-wielding neighbour seemed to me the usual suspect. I reassured her. 'No! No! The husband's sign is not at all needed.'
'However, I did inform him on phone.'
Her husband seemed to me a very broad-minded fellow. I didn't know whether to congratulate her or to commiserate with her. So I hastily turned to other aspects. 'Its good that you came a bit early.'
'Actually I wanted to come early in the morning, but I had some other work.'
'Oh! I did not mean early today. I meant that if you had delayed this removal, it would have started moving. Then it would have developed a heartbeat.'
The patient was staring at me wide eyed as if watching a horror movie. Looking at her face, I decided that she was not fit to listen to the grotesque details. I decided to relieve her a bit. I said, 'You will bleed a bit, but only for a few days.'
By now, the poor patient was trembling, 'how-H-How much bleeding?'
'Oh, only slightly more than your menstrual period, and it will continue only for a week or so.'
By now the patient was clutching her hair in her fingers and staring at me wide-eyed. I asked her soothingly, 'Why don't you lie down on the examination table? Remove your clothes and relax.'
This was the final straw. She didn't even wish me goodbye. I saw just a blur of motion leaving my consulting room at top speed.
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