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boTTu

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Hi Teega lagite donka anta kadilinatlundi. Manam bottu pettukovaala vadda anna daani gurinchi maataldukuntunnamu. Abbayilu kuuda pettukovaali ani tradition lo unte, abbayilu appudu pettukoka pote adi kuuda alochinchalsina vishayame. Ika vishayaniki vaste, bottu pettukuntunnama, leda annadi individuals interest. Bottu pettukovataniki respect ivvatam, bottu pettukovatam deniki ? magavallu adi cheyyatalledu, idi cheyyatalledu anduke memu ilaga chestuu vuntam ani vishayaanni side track cheyyatam (vithanda vadam cheyyatam) anevi andariki sambandinchina vishayam. Inko angle nunchi chuste vishayanni, may be not that relevant to our main topic. Girls always want to show and remind boys that they are equal to boys. To do this they follow different ways. But there is always difference between 0,1, -,+, Aada,Maga. we should never deny basic facts. Coming to strenghts Aada are morally and pshycologically stronger and Maga are physically stronger. Magavaallu chedipote physical ga chedatharu, individuals ke nashtam. Aadavaalu chedipote morals chedathayi, samajaniki nashtam. Means girls have more social responsibilities than boys. To keep them in that track there are many restriction on them, EE restrictions Anna, Naanna lu petti undaru. Bahusa Atta Kodallu petti untaru anduke komchem kashtam ga untayi. Aa paddatullo Bottu okati. Kaani Aada vallu chala goppavaallu, veetini chala oopikato aacharistunnaru. Hats off to them. Anta nijam garu Cheppinattu, chudataaniki ammayilu bottu lone Chuda chakka ga untaaru. Anta Nijam gaaru antaa nijame cheppettunnaru except his name :) :) ?

Posted by: Mr. Ananth Kumar Ilapakurthy At: 9, Jul 2003 11:42:49 PM IST

Ms Siri, you are targetting "me" when I didn't targetted any one person. I just made the generalised comments. You don't need to comment personally. Yes, I agree, that a girl who put "bottu" since the beginning would like to continue after the death of her husband. But we are not talking about "that" girl. We are talking about women folk. The whole women of India. Not specific to Ramyakrishna or Jayamalini or Savitri or Jamuna. WE ARE TALKING ABOUT THE ENTIRE WOMEN FOLK. Hence, I strongly object your comment //Entha sepu baisdga mataladekannaa , mundu manani manam samskarinchukoni taruvatha verokari pai velettite manchidi.// made by you. I also agree that I'm not the saint... or Jesus Christ... or Rama Krishna Paramahamsa... I don't say that I'm 100% fault-free person or 100% fool-proof person. I'm one among billions of men. So you don't need to critisise me personally. And I didn't commented that taking off bottu in recent days is also in-appropriate. I DID mentioned that we(means, men) are changing, the pace is coming. I didn't mean that its ME, the Durga Prasad, is changing... I'm the SriRamaChandra on earth. I said the men in current Indian society is slowly changing their attitude. I also agree that there are more % of people(men) who stare at women and look(or peep) for her private parts when she, the mother of an infant, is breast-feeding her baby and it is totally un-acceptable. But, at the same time, it is not the mother's right to do so in entire public, without taking necessary measures, taking it for granted that men SHOULD turn out their heads while she feeds the baby. ARANYA NEETHI madam, weaker section should always protect themselves from the threats, without putting it to the mercy of God, that God will punish the stronger section if it attacks the weaker section. What you are saying is like "gaalilo deepam petti, devudaa neede bhaaram"... which is funny. Exhibit is like this. And do you mean that because abbailu is not wearing dhothis or jandhyam so ammailu shouldn't wear saris & bottu? Just because abbailu wearing shorts and roaming topless in (Indian)beaches, do you mean that ammailu should also wear shorts move around topless in India? It is possible and acceptable in some other countries, but certainly not in India. This is not the modernization! Women need not compare themselves with men and compete with men. Biologically women have few limitations and advantages. Women have strong thigh muscles(to support them during pregnancy)hence they can stand for long time than men. Even then, women have 35% seats reserved in Andhra(more in certain states) citi buses. Why? It is basically for the women who comes with babies or pregnant women. So, as you want to prove yourselves as no more a weaker section, do you agitate for no reservations in buses? No. Why? Because it is your privilege. It is the extra respect (certin)men show towards women. As far as I understand, I didn't go against women. //iee “viewerski” samskaram anedi ledaaa??manamu chese tappudu panulaki verokarini doshiga nilabettatam entha varaku sariayenadi??// samskaaram ledanegaa cheppedi. samskaaram ledu ani telsinavaalla daggaraku enduku velthaaru? saaraa kottu daggara taagubothulu untaaru, paduchu pilla atugaa velthe naanaa gola chestaaru ani manaki telsinapudu, manam(girls) aa daarini avoid chestaaraa leda? ledoo, vaallaki samskaaram ledu, I'll go in that route, let them go to hell ani alaage mondiga velthe, who are responsible for the consequences? Who is the sufferer? murugu kaalava lo raayi vesthe adi thappakunda mana meeda chinduthundi... mari telisee enduku vesthaaru? I wanted to mention that women should be cautious from viewers. Madam, you may ask what will happen!? Nothing, the "akrama sambandhaalu". bottu teesesi, siromundanam chesi, gaajulu pagalagotti, tella cheera katti, nettina chengesi, channeella snaanam cheyinchi, moolana koorchobettedi enduko meeru guarantee gaa teleedu ani naa pragaadha viswaasam. cheptaa vinandi. What is happening in the present society, for an young woman loses her hubby and she does her daily activitiesm including going out for work and move closely with other men and some talented(so called samskaara heenudu, but looks like highly samskaaravanthudu from outside) man goes very close to her on the name of work(say software persons) and one day(o varsham kurisina raatri) it is so late in the night that her working women's hostel don't allow anybody to come in after 10:30 PM and her office doesn't have a provision to sleep and this talented guy, as he is so close to her, offers her to take her to his house, in his car? I don't need to say. Do you say that these (cinematic stories) incidents don't happen at all in the real life? Can you say that? If these kind of relations increase in their %, what happens to the society? We don't know who is who. That is the reason why, in those days, put those harsh... cruel... etc etc customs. And you definitely don't know the significance of "mettulu". Its the part of so called accu-pressure therapy. You remember rushis wearing the paavukollu(not quarter KG of chicken), the wooden footwear, having only one pointer kind of projection to hold it with the toe finger the finger adjacent to that, rigth? It also serves the same purpose of that of mettulu for men. The pressure exerted on those fingers, at those particular spots actually control(not totally eradicate) the sexual feelings, the urge of sex. Un-married girls can be trapped easily than married women(though they are away from their husbands for a short period... I repeat, short period), as married women wear mettulu which controls(minimize atlease a bit) the desire. This is the scientific reason behind mettulu. And that was the societal reason behind removing bottu etc. Hope you understand. I'm sorry folks, for going away from the discussion. But I couldn't refrain myself from answering Siri's direct blame on me. I may be a drunkard, a smoker or whatever, we're not here to talk on "me", we are just discussing the "general" issue, on the very broad range of sector. Not on individuals. My sincere thanks to all for your patience and forgive me if I make any wrong statement or hurt anyone personally.

Posted by: Durga Prasad At: 9, Jul 2003 6:45:26 AM IST

Modernization is never defined. Bottu enduku? is a question filled with frustration. I do not know if this needs to be asked. If someone feels bottu is not necessary....they are free not to wear it. And if people around them ask the reasons...they can be educated on the philosophy of the author. We have evolved to this current state from the time we were like any animals. Now if we keep asking questions like. Bottu enduku? Relation enduku? Rules enduku? Battalu enduku? Its ok. But where will we stop? Probably we will go back to jungles and slowly loose our minds too. Since we are in free land. You are free to keep or shed UR bottu and you have no right to ask someone to follow ur philosophy. All I know is bottu makes a girl look more beautiful. :) ------Nothing against anyone----

Posted by: Mr. antha nijam At: 9, Jul 2003 1:43:55 AM IST

bottu pettukovatam anedi hakku ayinappudu, bharta poyina tarvatha teeseyatam baadhyata. baadhyata unnappude hakku viluva untundi. inthakee enduku teeseyaali bharta poyinappudu? aame vidhava ani nalugu gurthinchaalane. enduku gurthinchaalu? aameki oka special respect ivvaalani. a special privilege kind of... every body knows that she lost her husband and she is responsible for her house, so let her go first, let her take some thing first... we can take later. idee daani background intention(more cannot be discussed). but vaallu youth ayithe, maa laanti kurra kaaru vedhavaalochanalu chestaaru(adi ee rojullo, not when that custom is made). nijame kada, andamaina vayasulo unna ammayi vidhava ayinappudu endaro vedhava choopulu choostaaru. anduke, aame andaanni kappi unchataanike, siga tarige vaallu, nettina chengu vesevaallu, tella cheera katti. anduke aame mukham(generalise chesi) choodakoodadnevaallu(uttine choodaddu ante manam voorukomugaa, anduke choosthe arishtam anevaallu) when they made this custom. ala undi unte parledu, bagane undedi. but ee ammayilu thinnagaa undaru kada, chengu teesesi, maamoolu battalesukuni, juttu unchukuni bayataki vasthaaru... when something is exhibited, the viewers will certainly see. when the see, they get the intention of acquiring it. its natural. so moodhaachaaralane vaallu, vaati venaka paramaardham kooda aalochinchaali. when they don't come out at all, where is the point of vedhava choopulu & cheshtalu? ancheta, aa custom unnappudu adi correct. ippudu maarindi kaabatti, maarchukovachhu, thappu kaadu. but thappu anedi ekkadante, pettukovaalsina annaallu pettukokunda, pettukokoodani rojullo pettukuntunnaaru. idi vaipareetyam kaadaa siri gaaroo? anant gaaru cheppinatlu ee aadaallu want to prove different, so want to do in the reverse. and one more thing, as he said, they don't realize their importance in the society. why does they want to have equal rights when are half of men? they are not some one different in the family, they are the part of the family. when they are the half part of men, why does they want to get away from men and want rights? why don't they enjoy the privilege of being part of men? men and women are inter-dependent. wife and husband IS one for their family, though they are two for outsiders. why don't they really realize that? when they understand what they are, then they don't need any of the arguments. when wife ask for rights from husband, the friction starts. when wife goes along with husband, the family travels smooth. Again, here, they ask "why should we go along with men? why don't men go along with women?"... friction. answer is, ours is male dominated society right from the beginning... centuries old. we just can't change it in a flash. so let it change in its own pace. it is changing. men are realising the importance of women. Thanks for your patience.

Posted by: Durga Prasad At: 8, Jul 2003 11:19:27 AM IST

Prastutam situation ela undante Chinnappadu, Pelli ayina taruvatha Bottu pettukovatam manchidi, mana tradition ante pettukoru. Husband poyintharuvatha bottu leka pote husband ledu ani telustundi, mana tradition adi ante, Appudu kaavaali antaaru. Nijamga Husband meeda gowravam unnavvallu evvaru deeni meeda charche ceyyaru. They just follow what our tradition told to them. Inkoka kothha vishayam, recent ga US lo foreigners are wearing Mettelu. i dont know what they know abt it. ika mana vaala vishayaniki vochesariki, prastutam bottu gurinchi matladukuntunnamu, tondaralo mettelu enduku vesukovali anna daanni gurinchi kuda maatladu kovalsi vastundi. Vishayam entante, Ammayilu now a days want to prove something different. They want to come out of an imaginary cage that they feel they were caught. This is because they are forgeting their importance in our society. It is becoming like that if you tell a kid not to do something, they do that. I feel we have to respect our values and tradition till whole society decides that it is wrong. Ex :- Widow marriages are good, practice it. But Bottu is still not decided as something wrong. so bottu pettukovala, vadda anna danimeeda discuss cheyyandi appude decide cheyyaddu. Decide ayyedaka respect ivvatam manchidi.

Posted by: Mr. Ananth Kumar Ilapakurthy At: 7, Jul 2003 11:01:55 PM IST

svapnA, boTTu peTTukunE adRushTam anTE, puni strI anEnA mI uddESam ?

Posted by: Durga Prasad At: 7, Jul 2003 5:05:15 PM IST

denikayina adhrushTam vunDaali

Posted by: Ms. Swapna Rani At: 7, Jul 2003 3:41:27 PM IST

Though not 100%, you are correct to the max, Siri. The significance is still there as of olden days... but we are losing it slowly.

Posted by: Durga Prasad At: 7, Jul 2003 11:03:52 AM IST

'Bindi' is derived from the Sanskrit word 'bindu' or a drop, and suggests the mystic third eye of a person. In ancient India, garlands were an important part of the evening-dress of both men and women. This was often accompanied by 'Visesakachhedya', i.e., painting the forehead with a bindi or 'tilaka'. In those days, thin and tender leaves used to be cut into different shapes and pasted upon the forehead. These leafy bindis were also known by various names — 'Patrachhedya', 'Patralekha', 'Patrabhanga', or 'Patramanjari'. Not only on the forehead, but also on the chin, neck, palm, breast and in other parts of the body, sandal paste and other natural stuff were used for decoration. The holy dot or bindi (also known as kumkum, mangalya, tilak, sindhoor and by other names) is an auspicious makeup worn by young Hindu girls and women on their forehead. It is usually a red dot made with vermilion (finely powdered bright red mercuric sulphide). Considered a blessed symbol of Uma or Parvati, a bindi signifies female energy (shakti) and is believed to protect women and their husbands. Traditionally a symbol of marriage (hence the widows did not wear vermilion), it has now become a decorative item and is worn today by unmarried girls and women of other religions as well. No longer restricted in color or shape, bindis today are seen in many colors and designs and are manufactured with self-adhesives and felt. Info collected from different websites...

Posted by: విజయ్ At: 6, Jul 2003 11:44:22 PM IST

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