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General Forum: Offbeat n Jokes | | Funny quotes--Siri | |
| The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits
-- Albert Einstein
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
-- Albert Einstein
Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 6, Dec 2002 6:14:44 PM IST
The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. But not in that order.
-- Brian Pickrell
Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 6, Dec 2002 6:14:14 PM IST
Absence -- that common cure of love.
-- Miguel De Cervantes
Love is the delightful interval between meeting a beautiful girl and discovering that she looks like a haddock.
-- John Barrymore
A kiss can be a comma, a question mark or an exclamation point. That's basic spelling that every woman ought to know.
-- Mistinguette (as quoted in Theatre Arts, Dec 1955)
Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.
-- Robert Frost
Love ceases to be a pleasure, when it ceases to be a secret.
-- Aphra Behn
(Love) A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
-- Ambrose Bierce
What the world really needs is more love and less paper work.
-- Pearl Bailey
Where love is concerned, too much is not even enough.
-- Pierre De Beaumarchais
Love is the heart of the soul.
-- Robert Paul
Love is a state in which a man sees things most decidedly as they are not.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche
Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 6, Dec 2002 6:13:04 PM IST
We must laugh at man to avoid crying for him.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte
You can't deny laughter; when it comes, it plops down in your favorite chair and stays as long as it wants.
-- Stephen King fromHearts in Atlantis.
Laughter is higher than all pain.
-- Elbert Hubbard
Laughter is the closest distance between two people.
-- Victor Borge
Not by wrath does one kill, but by laughter.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche
Start every day with a smile and get it over with.
-- W.C. Fields
A day without laughter is a day wasted.
-- Charlie Chaplin
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
-- Will Rogers
He who laughs, lasts.
-- Mary Pettibone Poole
Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 6, Dec 2002 6:11:46 PM IST
If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts.
Example isn't another way to teach, it is the only way to teach.
Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.
--Albert Einstein
Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 6, Dec 2002 6:09:44 PM IST
"You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is."
For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness
A man's wife has more power over him than the state has.
Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 6, Dec 2002 6:07:55 PM IST
To know the road ahead, ask those coming back.
Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it
Love can turn the cottage into a golden palace
He who is ashamed of asking is ashamed of learning
All the days of the oppressed are wretched, but the cheerful heart has a continual feast.
Yesterday is a dream, tomorrow but a vision. But today well lived makes every yesterday a dream of happiness, and every tomorrow a vision of hope. Look well, therefore to this day.
Love teaches even asses to dance. [ahahahah!!]
Man is harder than iron, stronger than stone and more fragile than a rose
Shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is half a sorrow
It is not enough to aim, you must hit
There is no need to fasten a bell to a fool [b carefull ahahahah!]
An evil man sows strife; gossip separates the best of friends [OMG!!!]
Friendship is a strong and habitual inclination in two persons to promote the good and happiness of one another
Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 6, Dec 2002 6:01:56 PM IST
ty
Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 6, Dec 2002 5:57:17 PM IST
nice n funny..siri
Posted by: Mrs. kala ch At: 6, Dec 2002 5:52:59 PM IST
Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.
--Unknown
One has fear in front of a goat, in back of a mule, and on every side of a fool
--Edgar Watson Howe
Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
--Robert A. Heinlein
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
--Will Rogers (1879 - 1935)
A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.
--Robert Frost
Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger
--Franklin P. Jones
Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant, and she fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny.
--Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 6, Dec 2002 5:45:54 PM IST
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