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General Forum: Love | | How to solve the problem if someone fail in love after marriage? | |
| Dear Madhavi & Kiran,
I do partially agree with you people but not completely.
Marrige should never become a COMPROMISE or a an OBLIGATION between two people, but it should be a BOND of FAITH and UNDERSTANDING, which is lacking between the couples of these days.
One more never ending topic idhi, ARRANGED MARRIAGES Best aa leka pothe LOVE MARRIAGES aa ??
College days lo ilaantivi debate chesi chesi ...............Nevermind.
Veelu ayinantha varaku vishayaanni clear cut ga unchukodam melu, otherwise that communication gap between a couple may lead to further complications.
Wish i got some more time to talk to you people..
Anyways, Nice discussion with you guys
Good Luck
regds
Kalyan
Posted by: Mr. Kalyan Chakravarthy At: 14, Jul 2002 2:15:50 PM IST
Wow very nice issue,
Consider every 100 marriages, am sure 90 are not satisfied, on one or the other issues. But its our great culture and belief that holds our relations.
Else similar to western countries 90% would apply for Divorse, never let down love which they (married couple) had on day one till death. Else just like others married people live compromisingly.
Solution: Never let love exhibitted initial days of marriage down as days passed. Prosper it and enhance it, if not atleast maintain it.
Posted by: Mr. Kesava Kumar Grandhi At: 14, Jul 2002 6:10:19 AM IST
Yes, I agree with that Kiran garu.
Posted by: Miss Madhavi Madhavi At: 14, Jul 2002 5:36:05 AM IST
Miss.Madhavi,
what i want to say is that right selection may help u not to fall in probs. but not that it is the final solution.
Anyhow the final solution may be comprising after marriage instead of compromising before marriage.
Posted by: Jonnalagadda Jonnalagadda At: 14, Jul 2002 0:33:34 AM IST
That is true, I partly agree with you Kiran garu,
Kaani lifelo eppudu anni manamu anukunnattu jaragadu. There are chances that one might marry a person without having much say or without knowing much about the other person. So, in that case what would you do?
So, whay I think is once after the marriage one has to learn to love the person who is now their husband/wife because there is no way to revert the situation back. For example, sometimes in an arranged marriage situation, not necessarily the boy or the girl may not have much say because their parents take the decisions. I am not saying that this would happen kaani okavela ala jarigithe, what to do? There is no way out once you get married. You have to live with the person for the rest of your life whether you like it or not, so might as well learn to know the person and try to find the good qualities that would help keep the marriage successful. And definitely communicating with each other helps a great deal because in an arranged marriage there is no love involved until the two are married. So, the two individuals should make an effort to slowly know and love each other inspite of their differences. That would make the marriage a successful one.
Posted by: Miss Madhavi Madhavi At: 14, Jul 2002 0:20:15 AM IST
U r right Ms.madhavi ,
and in addtition i wanted to say one more thing. i believe that this problem comes if u did not choose the right person. generally while choosing a person to love, many people will try to overlook somethings i.e even if they did not like some qualities in the second person they will compromise due to the interest or attraction on that person. this is human weakness this will be adjustable for only sometime. but during a longrun it will create a problem.
so initial ga person ni select chesukuneppude evari mentality ki taginavarini vaallu select chesukunte tarvata differences vache chances takkuva vuntayi.
Posted by: Jonnalagadda Jonnalagadda At: 14, Jul 2002 0:10:33 AM IST
Krishna garu,
There comes many times in life where one has to compromise even though they don't like to. And I think same thing applies to marriage. Actually, what I think is marriage is full of compromises because not everyone is perfect. After marriage it is the responsibility of both the individuals involved to understand each other and learn to love and live happily with each other. No matter what the differences are, they should be able to sort it out. That is what is our Indian culture. Our culture says that when you love and marry someone you should make every effort to make the marriage a successful one. Otherwise, your life and the lives of other people involved such as your families would get affected the worse way. And the people who suffer the most are the kids. Once you are married and have kids, and then the differences crop up, then no matter what you have to try every possible way to keep the marriage successful because if not the kid's life will be ruined. There are lot of examples of that in USA.
No matter whose fault it is, both should confront each other and talk over the problems because if you don't communicate then the marriage will surely break and I don't think once the marriage breaks, neither one would be happy for the rest of their lives and also, ruin the kids lives.
So, I would say is if you have a problem with your life partner, then you should directly talk to the person and be honest by telling them what is bothering you. I am sure that when you talk, the other person would realize and probably both of you can come to a conclusion. But you see thats what is marriage about making compromises and understand each other. Especially after having kid, both husband and wife should think about what is good for their kids rather than themselves.
These are just my views. I don't mean to hurt anyone.
Posted by: Miss Madhavi Madhavi At: 13, Jul 2002 11:56:00 PM IST
Hey,
if anybody fail in love can't be happy i.e also after marriage? can it be solved. how? once there is a wall in between them with regard to all aspects. Even she/he may love him/her still after being alone, but won't like to show before him/her.
In between if they have a child what about her future as it will effect on kid's life?
When she/he won't like to change her mentality and won't like to be together peacefully.
Many families we are seeing in and around. In these circumstances, nobody will help from both the sides. so what to do? is there any solution or only to end their lives?
think and come over here.
Posted by: Mr. V.S. KRISHNA KODUKULA At: 13, Jul 2002 12:37:53 PM IST
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