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General Forum: Offbeat n Jokes | | Today"s Joke...... | |
| . A Sarder goes into a store and sees a shiny object.
He asks the clerk, "What is that shiny object?"
The clerk replies, "That is a thermos flask."
The Sarder then asks, "What does it do?"
The clerk responds, "It keeps hot things hot and it keeps cold things cold."
The Sarder says, "I'll take it!"
The next day, he walks into work with his new thermos.
His Sarder boss sees him and asks, "What is that shiny object with you?"
He said, "It's a thermos flask."
The boss then says, "What does it do?" He replies, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."
The boss said, "Wow, what do you have in it?"
The Sarder replies, "Two cups of coffee and a coke."
Posted by: Mrs. Aruna At: 15, Feb 2003 11:07:49 AM IST
enjoy this..dudes!!! i donno abt u guys ..but i burst out laughing while reading them ..:)) soo funnyy n some soo truee ...
A Tribute to the Professors of India, on their usage of English.........
) ) # Inside the Class:
) )
) ) Open the doors of the window. Let the atmosphere
) ) come in.
) )
) ) Open the doors of the window. Let the Air Force come
) ) in.
) )
) ) Cut an apple into two halves - take the bigger half.
) )
) ) Shhh...Quiet, boys...the principal just passed away
) ) in the corridor.
) )
) ) You, meet me behind the class.(meaning AFTER the
) ) class)
) )
) ) Both of u three, get out of the class.
) )
) ) Close the doors of the windows please .. I have
) ) winter in my nose
) ) today.
) )
) ) Take Copper Wire of any metal especially of Silver.
) )
) ) Take 5 cm wire of any length.
) )
) ) shhh... quite, the principal is rotating in the
) ) school.
) )
) ) (Facing the Board) Dont talk in front of my back.
) )
) ) # About his family:
) )
) ) I have two daughters. Both of them are girls?(?)
) )
) ) # At the ground:
) )
) ) All of you, stand in a straight circle.
) )
) ) There is no wind in the ball.
) )
) ) # To a boy, angrily:
) )
) ) I talk, he talk, why you middle middle talk?
) )
) ) # Giving a punishment:
) )
) ) You, rotate the ground four times...
) )
) ) You, go and under-stand the tree...
) )
) ) You three of you, stand together separately.
) )
) ) Why are you late - say YES or NO ....(?)
) )
) ) # Sir at his best:
) )
) ) Sir had once gone to a film with his wife. By
) ) chance, he happened to
) )
) ) see one of our boys at the theatre, though the boy
) ) did not see them.
) )
) ) So the next day at school (to that boy):...
) )
) ) "Yesterday I saw you WITH MY WIFE at the Cinema
) ) Theatre."
Walk with Love in your Heart & You will Never Walk Alone !
Posted by: Ravi At: 14, Feb 2003 10:20:39 PM IST
athyadhika dhuraasha parudu
" First ranke kaakundaa,second,third rankulu kooda naake raavaalanukunevaadu"
Posted by: Raj Sekhar At: 14, Feb 2003 6:53:24 PM IST
good one raj !!! :-))))))
Posted by: Narendra Pratap Raju At: 14, Feb 2003 5:12:21 PM IST
When you get woken up at midnight by a phone
call...
Stupid Question:- Sorry. were you sleeping?
Answer:- No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa
marry or not. You thought I was sleeping.... you
dumb witted moron.
Posted by: Raj Sekhar At: 13, Feb 2003 7:33:35 PM IST
The boy is smoking and leaving smoke rings into the air.
The girl gets irritated with the smoke and says to her lover: "Can't you see the warning written on the cigarettes packet, smoking is injurious to health!"
The boy replies back: "Darling, I am a programmer. We don't worry about warnings, we only worry about errors."
Posted by: Mr. M.S.Reddy At: 12, Feb 2003 8:49:45 AM IST
yeah. right... he should have asked for a 10 inch duck instead...
Posted by: Mr. Spider Man At: 7, Feb 2003 10:12:54 PM IST
Difference between "Focus on problems" and "Focus on solutions"
This is really simple and interesting. Very often we get carried away with problem-solving. But if we keep it simple, we will move on faster.
I'm sure a number of us could learn from this....
When NASA began the launch of astronauts into space, they found out that pens wouldn't work at zero gravity. In order to solve this problem, they hired Andersen Consulting (Accenture today). It took
them ten years and 12 million dollars to develop a pen that worked at zero gravity, upside down, under water, on practically any surface including crystal and in a temperature range from below freezing to over 300 degrees C.
The Russians used a pencil !
Posted by: Mr. Spider Man At: 7, Feb 2003 8:57:57 PM IST
SOFTWARE ENGINEERS
At a recent software engineering management course in the US, the
participants were given an awkward question to answer. "If you had just
boarded an airliner and discovered that your team of programmers had been
responsible for the flight control software how many of you would disembark
immediately?"
Among the ensuing forest of raised hands, only one man sat motionless. When
asked what he would do, he replied that he would be quite content to stay
onboard.
With his team's software, he said, the plane was unlikely to even taxi as
far as the runway, let alone take off.
Posted by: Mr. Spider Man At: 7, Feb 2003 8:55:01 PM IST
Santa and Jeeto were delighted when their long wait to adopt a baby came to
an end. The adoption center called and told them that they had a wonderful
Tamil baby boy, and they took him without hesitation.
On the way home from the adoption center, they stopped by the local college
so they each could enroll in night courses.
After they filled out the forms, the registration clerk inquired, "What ever
possessed you to study Tamil?"
Santa and Jeeto said proudly, "We just adopted a Tamil baby, and in a year
or so he’ll start to talk. We just want to be able to understand him."
Posted by: Mr. Spider Man At: 7, Feb 2003 8:53:34 PM IST
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