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General Forum: Current 'Affairs' | | WHY SOME PARENTS ARE IN OLD AGE HOMES, WHILE THEY HAVE CHILDREN? | |
| I guess, the proverb u reap what u sow is apt in this case.
Posted by: DoBoy At: 27, Jun 2005 11:03:42 AM IST
hi, all, P& P
Some of the other reasons are:
One of the basic reason that there is lot of communication gap, misunderstanding between parents and kids, is that the parents compare the issues to their own times and make a comparision, while they dont take the present day reality into account.
The influence of the wife and her relationship with the in laws is also part of the reason, until they are perfect ,in harmony, things would not work.
The other major factor could be, whether the parents looked after their parents in their old age, which the kids would have observed, this also would have bearing on the kids of the parents. Like parents, like kids.
Posted by: DoBoy At: 26, Jun 2005 10:38:27 AM IST
"WHY SOME PARENTS ARE IN OLD AGE HOMES, WHILE THEY HAVE CHILDREN?"
It has basically got to do with the parents themselves . nothing to do with the wards .
The parents when the children are in their formative years ,nurture a wrong sense of pride in earning ,repeatedly point out the fact that it his/her hard earned money to the children .
I have seen most parents who have the tendency to point out that he/she earned for himself and herself ,rather than for the family he/she set up .
The kids are taught to fight ,in the open world ,face challenges ,over come obstacles an are taught a false sense of achievenmets .
The kids or children are never taught bonds ,relationships ,the value of family etc ,all that they are taught is ,he /she has to earn ,come up ,work in foreign countiries ,so that the parents can brag abt their kids ,in old age homes .
For example the if a father has 2 kids ,and one of the kid intends to invest in some property ,and the father has cash ,then the father makes it a point to get back the money that he lent one of his sons ,his excuse always being that he is answerable to the other son ,or another famous exuse would be ,that ,after his passing away the wealth would be divided equally .
I dont find it wrong ,for a father to recover money that he has lent ,but ,at the same time ,I have seen fathers pressurising the son ,in case he cant pay the due ,in some months ,due to domsetic commitements .
SO the bond or the relationship is lost in the due course of time and when the father mother are physically unable to take care of themselves <then they end up in asylums and old age homes .
many parents are egoistic ,and they always feel that they shd be a partand a parcel of the financial control of a house hold ,but ,given practical limitations ,like the wife of the child refusing to co-operate with the inlwas ,has its own share of headaches .
To retain their pride the parents walk out ,thinking they can take care of themselves with the pension ,or what ever money they have as an income ,etc .
I have never come across the low class ,people who live in old age homes or live away from their kids due to monetary reasons as such
So ,i end up telling you people that ,relationships are more monetarily based and money is the main reason why we have such problems .
Posted by: Mr. Pit and the Pendulum At: 25, Jun 2005 10:46:04 PM IST
I am of opinion that the following factors contribute for the old parents to prefer old aged homes than to be wth their sons/ daughters.
1. Misunderstanding with the behaviour of their sons/daughters
2. Because the sons/daughters are in abroad and the old parents are not in a possession to move out of country.
3. To maintain their indiduality and to like company of the birds of same feather.
4. Even though they go abroad to be with their sons/daughters, there they cannot spend time as prisoners in golden cage.
Posted by: Mr. VIRABHADRA SASTRI KALANADHABHATTA At: 25, Jun 2005 9:35:44 PM IST
Because they are more safe rather than with kids
Posted by: Mr. )++)(+)&*(( !%$RS£ At: 25, Jun 2005 7:33:32 PM IST
It is a well known fact, that inspite of old aged parents having sons/daughters, they prefer to still stay at old aged homes. Why do children iqnore the parents, who have given them life, career, money , get them married etc? Is it not obligation on children to take care of them in their old age, are the children doing the right thing?
Posted by: DoBoy At: 25, Jun 2005 12:03:47 PM IST
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