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General Forum: Current 'Affairs' | | Andhra girls are cool about dowry! - (A column from Times of India) | |
| kalam tho parugetti samajam ku thaginatlu brathikithene brathakagalam, lekunte evo vedaanthaalu valliste ika anthe.so status choopinchukovadam lo thappuledu:)
Posted by: Mr. vamsi reddy At: 15, Jul 2003 5:39:42 PM IST
dowry tisukovatam na drushti lo tappe. daniki edaina defence avanivandi.
e rojulo matalu "ma abai peli ki 1000 mandi ocharu" ante, "ma amai peli ki 1200 mandi ocharu" ala competition range lo spend chestunaru.
so mrrg sanctity gurinchi oche apdu dowry gurinche kaadu, meeru ana ilanti ' status -displays' kuda mrrg real meaning ni overtake chestunayi ananu.
Posted by: Ms. G Sunita At: 15, Jul 2003 5:37:13 PM IST
eerojullo manishi status nu vaadu pette karchu nu patte decide chestaaru. atuvantappudu evari status nu choopinchukovadaaniki vaalluy try chestaaru:)
Posted by: Mr. vamsi reddy At: 15, Jul 2003 5:35:23 PM IST
yeah dowry theesukovadam nenu thappanalede??.
:)
Posted by: Mr. vamsi reddy At: 15, Jul 2003 5:33:49 PM IST
expenses cheyodu anatledu, i am talking of the obvs wastage. i am certainly not defending the practise of dowry.
but i am surprised at so much of ur concern directed on the evil practise of "dowry" while u r blindly defending the over expenditure on weddings.
Posted by: Ms. G Sunita At: 15, Jul 2003 5:32:37 PM IST
ayithe oke saari mrrg chesesi aa amai ki life antha annam pettaru vala parents. inka vala husband ee a amai responsibility tiskuntadu.
then oke sari chetulu dulipeskuntuna burden ki 'dowry' ichi pampatam lo tapu emundi ta?
Posted by: Ms. G Sunita At: 15, Jul 2003 5:30:13 PM IST
ayithe sunitha gaaru endukandi meeru bayataku velletappudu neat ga thayyarayyi konchem make up vesukoni manchi battalu vesukoni velthaaru, maamuluga vellochu kadaa??. anthenduku cinema ku velletappude half an hour thayyarayi velthaaru cinema kuda thayaravadam antha avasaramaa??
aftral three hrs choose cinema ku antha cheste life lo okkeokkasaari chesukone marriage ku antha hungama cheyyadam lo thappent??
Posted by: Mr. vamsi reddy At: 15, Jul 2003 5:27:28 PM IST
interesting discussion.
but i am sure many of u know that, in some of the cases, the "dowry" given by the girl is just enuf for the guy to cover his side of the wedding expenses. so its not as if the guy will live his entire life on tht dowry money. its all finished on tht day itself, in many cases.
so why only dowry? when i attend weddings now-a-days, lakhs of rupees r spent on decorations, furniture, food, clothes etc etc all unproductive, non-recoverable expenses.
if we all agree tht mrrg shud be based on love and trust and not on money, then why all this hungama? why all this wastage? if our society has grown up enuf to realize the need of going against dowry, isnt it time we wake up and realize tht the tradition of showing-off and spending (many times with loans) on weddings is an even more short-lived and expensive practise?
Posted by: Ms. G Sunita At: 15, Jul 2003 5:13:14 PM IST
The same Nikita Rao will marry a guy DhanaPrem Rao by giving dowry of Rs 15,00,000 after seeying his house, his job and his etc etc. Are we going to watch whether she's giving dowry or not? Never.
ADavAri mATalakU arthAlE vErule
arthAle vErulE arthAlE vErule
aunanTE kAdanilE kAdanTe aunanilE
Hope you know this. So, just please don't quote the words of such "aadavaaru". I haven't seen a single girl, who said "I won't marry a man who demands dowry" and stood for her words till now in my life(though the sample may be less, but zero is the result). They can't really stand for their words. It is not possible. After all, they take their dad's money in the form of dowry with them to their husbands' house and enjoy with them. They love it internally... Thats it.
Posted by: Durga Prasad At: 15, Jul 2003 4:52:45 PM IST
According to one of the members comments it is given ,
............................................
When we get marry surely will have a good job, once you have good job there is no need of giving/getting dowry. Ofcourse dowry is nothing one who has money. Most of the peoples dont have much money, it is well known, why to get dowry, why to give dowry
............................................
Wow , what a 100% wrong statement ?
Most of the people don't have money and it is well known (according to comment given above).
My friend forgot to apply the asme statement for JOBs . Most of the people are jobless ,which is a well known fact for people except the person who has commented the above.
so , if at all men of india wait for marriage till they get GOOD JOB (as the person said ) , i think they will never be married or else they will be married the at age of 40 / 50 .
By the by what is the meaning of GOOD JOB ?
what is the basis for deciding that the salary of a person is GOOD and safe ?
surely NO BASIS. If a person get 5000 per month, is that a good job ...? Yes ,if the person lives in village where as if the same person is in city it is not even sufficient for house rent. If the salary is 25000 per month then is it the Good job ? here also we can't say .
So it is impossible to decide which is good job and which is not ..it depends on individual . if person getting 50000 per month may not feel it as good job and he may feel that getting 1 lac per month is good . so Definition for Good job is an NONEXISTENT.
And as all of us know (in general case),
The dowry and the salary are directly proportional . What does it mean ? the parents of girls are not throwing money simply for an unqualified person ... if they feel that he is qualified enough for their daughter then only they give money ..and if not they will look for some Other alliance.
ofcourse there are persons who marry without taking dowry ...really they are great and we should appreciate if and only if they don't look for money from the girl after the marriage (that is what create nuisance and causes splittings , tortures , suicides etc).
Those who are frank, in asking for dowry are better than those who don't ask for dowry during the match making . B'cos probability of taking lenience on ladies is more in the men mentioned in the later case.
For whom are the parents of girl giving money? Definitely not for an unknown fellow who is roaming on roads. They are giving money for the the needs of daughter and son-in-law . Then why do they worry a lot ? By giving money , they provide much more strong economical base for the new couple.
If we see the profiles in matrimonial sites (particularly www.pellisandadi.com), definitely more than 75% of women profiles contain one sentence indicating the amount of the property share that they get from their parents . Don't u wonder ? Why are these ladies keeping that matter ? That means they are exhibiting their dowry giving capability to compete with other ladies profiles . So whom should we blame?
The men /women ? That is why there is a saying "AADAVAALLAKU AADAVAALLE SATRUVULU".
So , when a person is ready to give ,there will be some person to take ...so the mistake is with both the parties .
There are ladies ,who clearly mention in matrimonial profiles that they are not willing to give dowry , such people also should be appreciated ... and we wish that they get good life partner.
(just like low budget - superhit movies ...
no budget - superhit moguds).
It doesn't matter , whether to give dowry or not ? But , how happily does the couple spend their life together matters. And it is 100% true that by giving more and more money , you can not get better and better qualified(in terms of character , understanding ,caring ) person.
Don't bother about dowry issue(to give or not) at all but pray for good life partner which is of more important than money.
That is all for now .. ,
See u all
Murali T Mohan
Posted by: Mr. Murali Mohan T At: 14, Jul 2003 12:26:19 PM IST
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