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General Forum: Offbeat n Jokes | | jokes-- enjoy | |
| Customer : Waiter, do you serve crabs?
Waiter : Sit down, sir,we serve anyone.
Customer : Waiter, is this a lamb chop or pork chop?
Waiter : Can't you tell the difference by taste?
Customer : No, I can't.
Waiter : Then does it really matter?
Customer : Waiter, there's a dead beetle in my soup.
Waiter : Yes Sir, they are not very good swimmers.
Customer : Waiter, there's a fly in my soup.
Waiter : That's all right, Sir, he won't drink much.
Customer : Waiter, there's a fly swimming in my soup.
Waiter : So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?
Customer : Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in
my tea cup?
Waiter : I wouldn't know, Sir, I'm a waiter, not a
fortune teller.
Customer : Waiter, this soup tastes funny.
Waiter : Funny? But why aren't you laughing?
Posted by: Mrs. Aruna At: 18, Jun 2003 8:21:29 AM IST
Dear Mr.Bill Gates,
This letter is from Banta Singh from Punjab. We have got a computer in our home and we face some Problem, which I want to bring
to your notice.
After connecting to Internet we planned to open an email account. But when ever we fill the Form of Hotmail, in password field
only * comes. But in rest of the fields whatever we typed comes but we faced The problem only in Password field. We checked with Hardware vendor and he said that
there is no problem in keyboard. Because of this we have opened the email account with password *****. But I request u to check this as we ourself don't know what is the password!!!.
The next one is that we are unable to enter anything after we shut down the computer. There is a button for start but not for
pause, stop as in stereo recorder. We request u to add the same in future.
There is a option as RUN in menu. This one of my neighbor after clicking started running and he has run up to Amritsar from
Chandigarh. So we request u change that to SIT. So that we can click that by sitting.
One doubt is that can I click Re cycle bin??. I own a scooter in my home.
Is there a separate option as Re scooter bin
available in the system?
In Microsoft outlook we are able to see the outer view of the mail. Is there an in look through which we can have inner view
of the mail?
The last one is my wife has lost the door key of our house. So I searched for the same in search option of start icon. But I did not find the same there also .Is it a bug?
Rest In next letter.
Yours Anonymously
Bantha Singh.
Posted by: Mr. M.S.Reddy At: 18, Jun 2003 8:15:41 AM IST
A girl says to her boyfriend, "One kiss and I'll be yours
forever."
The guy says 'thanks for the warning'
_____________________________________________
A Husband Was Asked: "Do you talk to your wife after sex?" He
replied:
"Depends, If I Can find a Phone"
_____________________________________________
Definition of a Gynaecologist: Someone who looks for problems
where others
look for pleasure!!!
_____________________________________________
Man to wife on wedding night-"Are you sure I'm the first man you
are
sleeping with? "Of course honey, I stayed awake with all the
others!'
_____________________________________________
SARDAR TO A GIRL- Sunitha I want to marry you.
SUNITHA - But I'm a year older than you
SARDAR - Koi Baat Nahin! I'll marry you next year!
____________________________________________
WHAT DID GOD SAY WHEN HE CREATED THE FIRST NEGRO.
SHIT I BURNT ONE....
_____________________________________________
Why did they stop printing PAMELA ANDERSON stamps in the U.S.?
Because
people started licking the wrong side
_____________________________________________
A boy asked Airtel Girl:what is ur speciality?
Airtel Girl: Nighttime incoming free!!
_____________________________________________
Doctor to his lady patient:' U look so weak and exhausted! Are u
having
ur meals three times a day as I advised?
Lady: Doctor, I thought you said three males a day!!
____________________________________________
Ek kavi shaadi ke baad biwi se bola: Aaj se tum hi meri kavita
ho, prerna
ho, hawana ho, Kalpna ho!
Patni: Mere liye bhi aaj se aap he dinesh ho, rohit ho, rakesh
ho!
____________________________________________
And the best: A sardar kid beaten on the ass by his teacher,
goes home,
looks at his back n the mirror and says: "Saale ne maar maar ke
doh tukde
kar diya!!"
Laugh and live long..
sreenu.
Posted by: Mr. Sreenivasa Reddy V At: 10, Jun 2003 11:42:45 AM IST
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