Discussion on Offbeat n Jokes in General Forum at TeluguPeople.com

Just 4 Laughs ;))

School Master from a remote rural area in Bihar was transferred to a new school in Mumbai. He reported for duty two days after actual date of joining. Consequently was asked for explanation in writing. His explanation was Deer sur, "This is my first vijit to Bombai. If small small mistakes get inside my letter,I ask pardon. Stickly speaking, I wanted to joint your school more fastly,but for the following reason, too much time lost in getting slipper reservation in three-tyre compartment. The clerk rejected to give ticket to I and my sun. I put complaint on station master. He said I to go to lady clerk. At first she also rejected. But at last with great difficulty she gave a birth only to my sun. Anyway I thanked the station master because he was responsible for getting birth of my sun. I hope u will see my story and late me first time I am now ending this fastly. May God blast you!" Thank you. Pinkesh yadav

Posted by: Mrs. shaloo At: 17, Apr 2006 11:53:08 AM IST

o^ muddu peTTuko^naa Daarling` anaDigaaDu tanu pre^mistunna sujaatani ade^m kudardu peLLainataruvaata peTTuko^ andi muripemgaa peLLaite^ mi^ Ayana peTTuko^nivvaDe^mo^ annaaDu ati vinayamgaa

Posted by: Mr. Bhaskar At: 15, Apr 2006 10:23:07 PM IST

Thinking Sardar What do you think will a Sardar be thinking when he finds a banana peel fallen in front of him ? Ans: "Sala aaj bhi girna padega". _____________________________________________ Our sardarji was filling up an application form for a job. He promptly filled the columns titled NAME,AGE,ADDRESS etc. Then he came to the column Salary Expected : He was not sure as to what to be filled there. After much thought he wrote : Yes

Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 15, Apr 2006 5:37:23 PM IST

There was a Sardarji who was down on his luck. In order to raise some money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. He went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him,"I've kidnapped you."The Sardarji then wrote a note saying: "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag & put it beneath the mango tree next to the slide on the north side of the city playground". Signed, "A Sardarji" The Sardarji then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the Sardarji checked, and sure enough a paper bag was sitting beneath the mango tree. The Sardarji opened up the bag and found the $10,000 with a note saying, "How could you do this to a fellow Sardarji?!"

Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 15, Apr 2006 5:35:13 PM IST

A woman was complaining to the neighbor that her husband always came home late, no matter how she tried to stop him. "Take my advice," said the neighbor, "and do what I did. Once my husband came home at three o'clock in the morning, and from my bed, I called out Is that you, Srinu?' And that cured him." "Cured him!" asked the woman, "but how?" The neighbor said, "You see, his name is Shiva."

Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 15, Apr 2006 5:26:36 PM IST

A wife, one evening, drew her husband's attention to the couple next door and said, "Do you see that couple? How devoted they are? He kisses her every time they meet. Why don't you do that?" "I would love to." replied the husband, "but I don't know her well enough."

Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 15, Apr 2006 5:10:32 PM IST

A baby was born to a Chineese couple, with tiny eyes, nose, ears and mouth. They named him Lingwingwong. Soon a second baby was born who had tiny ears, eyes,nose and mouth again. They named him Chingwingwong. Then the third was born. It had big ears, eyes, nose and mouth. The parents thought for long and guess what they named him. ----)Somethingwrong!

Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 15, Apr 2006 5:09:05 PM IST

Bed time story What's the difference between women at the age of 8, 18, 28, 38, 48 and 58? 08 - You take her to bed and tell her a story. 18 - You tell her a story and take her to bed. 28 - You don't need to tell her any story to take her to bed. 38 - She tells you a story and takes you to bed. 48 - You tell her a story to avoid going to bed 58 - You stay in bed all day to avoid hearing her story

Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 15, Apr 2006 5:08:34 PM IST

Teacher : Why are you late? Balgobin : Because of the sign. Teacher : What sign? Balgobin : The one that says , "School Ahead,Go Slow". *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : Why are you doing your math sums on the floor Balgobin : You told me do it without using tables! *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : Balgobin how do you spell "crocodile"? Balgobin : "K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L" Teacher : No, that's wrong Balgobin : May be it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it! *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : What is the chemical formula for water? Balgobin : "H I J K L M N O"!! Teacher : What are You talking about? Balgobin : Yesterday You said it's H to O! *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : Balgobin, go to the map and find North America. Balgobin : Here it is! Teacher : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America? Class : Balgobin! *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : Balgobin, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago Balgobin : Me! *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : Balgobin, why do you always get so dirty? Balgobin : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are. *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Balgobin : Dad can you write in dark? Father : I think so. What do you want me to write? Balgobin : Your name on this report card *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects? Balgobin : Don't bite any . *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : Balgobin give me a sentence starting with "I" Balgobin : I is.... Teacher : No, Balgobin. Always say, "I am". Balgobin : All right..."I am the ninth letter of the alphabet". *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : "Can anybody give me example of COINCIDENCE?" Balgobin : " Sir , my mother and father got married on the same day , same time". *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?" Balgobin : " Because George still had the axe in his hand?" . *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Balgobin : Daddy have you ever being to Egypt? Father : No. why do you ask that? Balgobin : Well, where did you get this mummy then? *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots! Balgobin : Yes it really strange. I've got another pair just like that at home. *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : Now , children if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing? Balgobin : Brotherly love? *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : Balgobin do , tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating? Balgobin : No Sir my mom is a good cook *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : Balgobin your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his? Balgobin : No teacher its the same Dog! *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-* Teacher : What do you call a person who keeps in talking when people are no longer interested? Balgobin : A teacher ************************************************************** Santa and Banta are best friends. Santa has very good job but Banta is jobless. They decide that they'll apply together for the next job. On day of the interview, Santa tells Banta that he will go inside first and answer all questions except the last one and after coming out he would tell Banta all the questions & answers. So when Banta will go and answer there, he will get the Job. So, Santa goes in. EMPLOYER: When did India get independence? SANTA: Efforts started in 1857, but got freedom in 1947. EMPLOYER: Good. Who is India's Prime Minister ? SANTA: It changes daily and these days its Atal Bihari Vajpayee. EMPLOYER: OK. What is India's population? SANTA: (He was not to reply last one so he says) Good Question, Research is going on, and when I know, I will tell you Sir. Now he comes out and tells Banta all questions and answers. In a state of nervousness, Banta remembers all answers but forgot the questions. He goes in now. EMPLOYER: When were you born? BANTA: Efforts started in 1857, but got freedom in 1947. EMPLOYER: What???? Who is your father? BANTA: It changes daily and these days its Atal Bihari Vajpayee. EMPLOYER: Employer is upset now. Are you mad Mr. Banta? BANTA: Good Question, Research is going on, and when I know, I will tell you Sir.

Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 15, Apr 2006 5:04:15 PM IST

uu! tEnksanDi !

Posted by: Mr. Siri Siri At: 15, Apr 2006 4:51:47 PM IST

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