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Do you know what ABCD is?

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u know indans in UK call UK born indians as cocos..meaning coconuts their skin is only brown and from inside they are just like white s!!

Posted by: Mr. V Madhav At: 29, Oct 2002 6:17:58 PM IST

Hi All, This is a small story based on the predictions that India will become super power by 2020. Dream of an American - Year 2020 Place: Two Americans at IBM, USA. Currency Conversion Rate: Rs. 1 = $ 100. Mark : Hi John, I think you didn't come to office for the past two days. John : Yeah, I was in Indian Embassy for getting Visa. Mark : Oh really? What happened, I heard that nowadays it has become very difficult. John : Yeah, but I managed to get it. Mark : How long it took to get it stamped? John : Oh, it was nasty man, long queue. Bill Gates was standing in front of me and they played with him like anything. That's why it got delayed. I went there at 2 am itself and waited and returned by 4 pm next day. Mark : Really? You should have patience man,you are going to India, keep it in mind. In India, it is a matter of an hour to get stamped for USA. John : Yeah, but that is because who in India will be interested in coming to USA man, their economy has been booming. Mark : What did they ask you? John : Oh god! I had a hard time convincing that guy in the counter that I will definitely return to America! I had shown all my asset documents of my land in New York to convince him. I said America's economy is rebuilding and it will strongly encourage me to seek a job here! Mark : So, when are you leaving? John : Anytime, after receiving my tickets from the client in India and you know, I will be getting a chance to fly Air-India. Sort of dream come true. I will be landing in Bombay! Mark : That's great! Be careful, I heard Bombay airport is a city by itself and you can easily get lost! I also heard there are three runways and there is a flight landing/taking off every 6 seconds! John: Oh yeah! Thats why it is the busiest airport in the world. Mark : How long are you going to stay in India? John : What do you mean by how long? I am planning to settle in India, my company has promised me that they will process my Hara Patta. Mark : Really, lucky person man, it is very difficult to get a Hara Patta for India. John : Yeah, that's why, I am planning to marry an Indian girl there. Mark : But you can find lots of American girls in Bangalore, Madras, Hyderabad and Mumbai. In fact there is a place called "Jag Sen (Jagjeeth Sen) heights" in Calcutta which is full of Americans. You can even find a dunkin' donuts shop there! John : Wow! But, I prefer Indian girls because they don't divorce and force you for alimony payments. Mark : Where did you get the offer, Bangalore? John : Yeah, salary is good there, but cost of living is quite high, it is Rs. 1000/- for a single room accommodation, which i have to share with 10 americans. Mark : I see, that's too much for American people, Rs. 1/- = $ 100/-. Oh God! What about in Mumbai, Hyderabad, Madras? John : No idea, but it is less than what we have in Bangalore. It is the world headquarters of Software. Mark : Do you have any relatives in India? John: Yeah! My three uncles live in "New Joshi" village. My cousins are studying in IIT and REC. Mark : Wow! IIT? I heard they give Aid to only American students from Harvard and Stanford! John : Yeah man! The Indian Embassy does not think twice to issue student visa if you are from Stanford or Harvard. Infact, they really need brilliant americans, so they issue Visa easily. Mark : My cousin applied to University of Madras and they replied saying they have limited Aid! It seems there are so many American students in University of Madras, West Bengal State University, State University of New Delhi (SUND). John : That's true! They even have an american student association in West Bengal State University and they have cultural shows for halloween! Mark : It seems Indian professors are great disciplinarians! They will kick you out of class if you talk, eat or take a bathroom break during class. John : That's true! American students are not used to such strict approach and discipline! Mark : That's why America is like this and India is so advanced than us because they have that discipline. John : That's true! Mark : I heard, almost all the Indians have a car. John : You can get a BMW car for Rs. 5000/-, and a Mercedes for less than Rs. 7500/-. But my dream is to purchase Ambassador, which costs Rs.200000/- which has got a sexy design. Mark : Ambassador? Wow! I don't think there is even a single Ambassador in America! hahahah! John : Yeah thats true! hahaha . In India, even taxis are Ambassador!!!! Mark : India is India! By the way, who is your client? John : WipInfoSaty, a pure Indian company,specializing in Embedded Software. Mark : Oh, really? lucky to work in a pure Indian company. They are really intelligent and unlike American body-shoppers who have opened their fly-by-night outfits in India. Indian companies pay you in full even when you are on bench. My friend Paul Allen, it seems, used his bench time to visit Bihar, the most livable place in India, probably world. There you have full freedom and no restrictions. You can do whatever you want! I wonder how that state has perfected that system. John : Yeah man, you are right. I hope our America also follows their footsteps. Mark : How are you going to cope with their language? John : Why not? )From my school days I have been learning Kannada as my first language here at New York. At the Consulate they tested my proficiency in Kannada and were quite impressed by my cent percent score in TOKIL i.e.Test Of Kannada as International Language. Mark : So, you are going to have fun there. John : Yeah, I will be traveling in the world's fastest train between Yelahanka and Bangarapet, world's largest theme park, It is very much delightful watching tamil movies at Devi, Abirami, Sathyam, Santham, Subham, Albert, Udhayam, Mayaajal, theatres in madras. Have the Glimpse of Basavanna statue at Ulsore Lake, Week long Kannada Rajyotsava celebrations organised by Tamil associations near Ulsore in bangalore and never to forget to read the worlds best news daily "Dhina Thandhi" and the famous Kollywood where you can see actors like, Kamal Hassan, It seems Rajanikanth shifted his base to bangalore too and all. Esselworld is also near to Kollywood. Mark: Is your wife coming with you? John: My wife will also come with me. When my wife gets pregnant my parents are planning to join me in India to help her during her labor. If my son/daughter are born in India they will obtain Indian citizenship! Mark : Sounds like a plan! Hey is it hard to obtain a blue card in India? John : Lot of americans manage to get it, But it is still hard. Mark : You know, the Indian PM is scheduled to visit US next year, he may then relax the restrictions of visa procedures. It all depends on our president of convincing him to do that. Our president is a waste guy. I dont know how he can impress Indian PM. John : That's true. They have even made arrangements in New york City Marriott hotel so that the suite will be converted to a maharaja bunker for the PM. Last month, the Indian minister for IT, visited White House and donated Rs. 200,000,000/- for infrastructure development at Silicon Valley and has promised more if we follow the model of Lalbagh Park and Kengeri falls of Bangalore. Bill Gates also got a chance of meeting him. Very lucky person. Mark : Hey don't forget to visit the twin LIC towers in Chennai! John : Yeah man! I read in some magazine that Indian government was forced to build those 170 floor LIC towers because every Indian citizen has an LIC policy, that they needed such a huge building to keep everyone's records! Mark: Why not? When you have 1.3 billion citizens seeking LIC policy you better have a big ofice.OK, Good Luck John. John : Same to you Mark. And don't go to Consulate in a Kurta Pyjama or dhoti, because they will think you are too Indianised and may doubt you will never come back and hence your Non-Immigrant Visa may get rejected. Wear a baseball hat too and not the topee, But don't forget to say "Namaskara sar,Chennagi Iddeera" to the Visa officer at Window 5. It seems he likes that since he is from bangalore and will not give you a visa if you don't greet him that way. Hope, this will come into reality.

Posted by: Mr. Prathap KORA At: 29, Oct 2002 5:02:12 PM IST

good ra keep it up

Posted by: Mr. latha Sneha At: 15, Sep 2002 2:41:01 AM IST

Very nice one. I really surprise how you people get those thoughts, very different, very creative and very funny. I wish I could beat that. But no interest either. Expecting more of this kind.

Posted by: Ms. Prasanthi Uppalapati At: 12, Sep 2002 2:43:16 PM IST

cool, good job... keep it up.

Posted by: Sreedhar G At: 12, Sep 2002 9:53:08 AM IST

ABCD: American born confused desi

Posted by: Mr. Naveen Kumar Reddy At: 12, Sep 2002 4:54:14 AM IST

Nice work!! Nice thinking Lata

Posted by: Mrs. lata v At: 12, Sep 2002 3:47:53 AM IST

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