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General Forum: Offbeat n Jokes | | Last Episode Of "kbc" | |
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Santa qualifies for KBC
We have our famous friend Santa Singh qualifying for the hot seat.
AMITABH: OK Santa I congratulate you for this opportunity here with us.
Santa : Oh ji Wahe guru da khalsa wahe guru di fatah. Chak denge phatte aaj. Tusi start karo ji.
AMITABH : OK Santa this is your first question for 1000 Rs. Which state has the largest Sikh population ? and your options are
A. Punjab
B. Punjab
C. Punjab
D. Punjab
Santa : Oh ji how much time do I've to answer this question
AMITABH : Samay ki koi pabandhi nahi hai Santa ji, you can take your time
Santa (giggles) : Sir ji tricky sawaal puchha hai aapne. I wud like to use my lifeline.
AMITABH : I'm not surprised on this , which one wud U like to use.
Santa : Audience poll
AMITABH : OK audience please be ready with your voting pads, and your time starts now.
After a minute we have a graphic presentation on the board.
A. 25%
B. 25%
C. 25%
D. 25%
AMITABH : Santa ji, this is a no good situation for you, I can share your disgust here. Par kya karen janta to janardhan hoti hai. So you would like to go with which option.
Santa : Yeh mere saath hi kyon hota hai. Fasa diya sirji aapki audience ne. I think I've to use my second lifeline - 50 50.
AMITABH : Very good 50 50 ka istemal karna chahenge. Man me shanka ho to lifeline zaroor istemal karni chahiye, mein sab ko yehi salah deta hoon. (Getting closer to Santa and whispers in his ears ) Isi ke to paise milte hain mujhe. (Aloud) OK computer ji do galat jawab mita diye jayen.
Computer displays
A. Punjab and C. Punjab
Santa : Badi chalu machine hai aapki sar ji. Mein chodoonga nahi aaj isko. Wahe guru de kasam mereko third life line bhi chahiye.
AMITABH : Kamal hai Santa ji, I must congratulate you. You have broken a record of using all the lifelines in the very first question. This is great . OK phone a friend - kisko phone karna chahen ge aap.
Santa : My one and only one mera langotiya yaar., Banta Singh.
AMITABH : OK Banta ko phone lagaya jaye. Aap dono ikkathe he kam karte hai.
Santa : Oh nahi ji ham dono pechle 6 saal se 10th mein fail ho rahe hain . Badi pakki yaari hai ji hamari, wahe guru de kasam. Phone rings. Banta picks it " Hulloooooo, kon hai oye adi raati, ???"
AMITABH : Hello Banta ji , mein Amitabh Bachhan bol raha hoon Star Plus ke Kaun Banega Crorepati se.
Banta : OOOOOOOOOO Bachan ji Sasriyakal, koi hor hota to uski to mein #$^$%$#$%$%$&. Kee haal chal he sar ji.
AMITABH : Mein thik hoon Banta ji, par ye ek family show hai is liye aap apshabdon ka prayog na karen to behtar hoga. Aapke dost yahaan bethe hain mere saath aur.................
Banta (Interrupts) : Aur wo sala pehle hi question pe atak gaya hoga, khota hai sala. Sawal pucho ji.
AMITABH : Aapko sirf tees second .,.............. chaliye mein aapko special case ke tarah treat karte hue 1 minute doonga. Aur aapka samay shuru hota hai ab.
Santa : Oye bante ke ho raya hai yaar ??
Banta : oye ullu de dum, saale bahar se taala laga gaya khote. Sawere dud wala aaya si, paise mang raya si, aur khotya tu meri kameez pehen gaya. Sale chakki se aata lana tha, tera piyo laye ga.
AMITABH : Santa ji kya kar rahe hain samay khatam ho raha hai.
Santa : Yes Yes. Oye chad uss gal nu yaar question hai ..................... (he tell him the question).
Banta : Saale sari zindagi tere nakal mar ke fail hota raha hoon, par iska answer mujhe aata hai. Kalank hai tu Punjab ke naam pe . Iska answer Punjab hai lallu.
Santa : oye par ......... (and the clock stops).
AMITABH : Samay khatam, aapke mitr ne jawab de diya hai , ab to mujhe pakka confidence hai ke aap kam se kam 1000 to le ke jayenge hi aaj.
Santa : Ullu ka patha hai ji, ye to mujhe bhi pata hai par sale ne yeh to batya nahin ke A hai ya C hai.
And this was the last episode of KBC.
Hope u all have enjoyed this.
Amitabh: what is the company i owned known as: A)acbl B)abcl C)alcb D)aclb
Respondent: B.. abcl!
Amitabh: are you sure?
Respondent: yes
Amitabh: pucca
Respondent: yes, yes
Amitabh : confident
Repondent : yes, confident
Amitabh: taala laga doo?
Repondent: boss, taala pahale se hi laga hua hai?
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Laloo zaps Amitabh
We have our famous Laloo ji qualifying for the hot seat. (And he claims that he didn't get hold of the "parcha" (for the qualifying question) to get in)
Amitabh : Laloo ji, Ek hazaar rupeyon ke liye, aapka pehla sawaal... yeh raha.....
Laloo : EeyHo, Hum toh sune the, eihaan karod rupya milat hai, aap to ek hazaar kee baat kar rahe hein??
Amitabh : Laloo ji aapne bilkul sahi suna hai, magar aapko pandharvein sawaal ka sahi jawaab dene par ek crore rupay milenge.
Laloo : Bakk!!! Toh kahe hamar-tumahar samay barbaad karte ho, sidhe oohee sawaal puchiye na!!!
-----------------------
Phone A Friend
Santa Singh after reaching 13th question:
Amitabh: apka 13th question 25 lakh yeh raha apke samne...
Contestant Santa Singh is tensed.
Amitabh: Who is the father of Abhishek Bachchan Computer Screen:
A. Amitabh Bachchan B. Laloo Prasad Yadav
C. Mohd. Azhar D. General Perverz Musharaff.
Amitabh: Apka kya jawab hai? (He is quite sure that Santa will opt for A)
But Santa is still confused.
Amitabh: Apke pas do life line hai... (50:50 and phone a friend)
Santa: I think it is A but am not sure.
Amitabh: Not sure... Hmmm Ap kya karna chahenge?
Santa: I would like to use 50:50?
Amitabh: Ok computer, 2 galat javabo ko mita de...
Computer:
B. Laloo Prasad Yadav.
C. Moh. Azhar.
Amitabh is confused and tensed thinks how come the computer has made this mistake but as is said in bollywood the show must go on. Now Santa is confused.
Santa: I would like to use the last lifeline phone a friend...
Amitabh: Ap kisko phone karna chahenge?
Santa: Mein Jaya Bachan ji ko phone karna chahoonga...
Posted by: Manjesh Choudhary Gorjala At: 29, Apr 2002 9:10:20 AM IST
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