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General Forum: Offbeat n Jokes | | Women - Their words | |
| THIS IS KOOL!!!
At a doctors surgery one morning a patient arrives complaining of serious backache. The doctor examines him and asks him"What the hell did you do to your back?"
The patient replies "You know that I work for a local night club? Today morning I got home to my apartment early
and heard a noise in my bedroom. On entering I knew someone had been sleeping with my wife and the balcony door was open. I rushed out the balcony door and did not find anyone. As I looked down from the balcony I saw a man running out and he was dressing himself. I grabbed the fridge and threw it at him,That's how I strained my back"
The 2nd patient arrives looking as if he has been in a car wreck. The doctor says "My previous looked bad,
but you look terrible.What the hell happened to you?" He replies, "You know I have been unemployed
for a while now .Today was the first day at my new job. I forgot to set my alarm and was running late. I was running out of
the building, getting dressed at the same time, and you won't believe it but I was hit by a fridge."
The 3rd patient arrives; he looks even worse than the other two patients do. The doctor is shocked. Again asks,
"What the hell happened to you?" "Well I was sitting in a fridge & someone threw it from the 3rd floor!"
Posted by: Mr. M.S.Reddy At: 22, Jul 2002 2:28:40 PM IST
hey Missy,
will these apply to you too :):)
Just Kidding dear, take it easy
regds
Kalyan
Posted by: Mr. Kalyan Chakravarthy At: 22, Jul 2002 2:17:36 PM IST
well, it may look bit odd if a girl has to post things like this...but this is quite interesting...just go through it :-)
Enjoy!
=================================
) ) FINE
) ) This is the word we use at the end of any argument that we feel we
) ) are right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine to describe
how
) ) a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments.
) )
) ) FIVE MINUTES
) ) This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that
your
) ) football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so I
) ) feel that it's an even trade.
) )
) ) NOTHING
) ) This means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is
) ) usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn
) ) you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually
signifies
) ) an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word
"Fine."
) )
) ) GO AHEAD (with raised eyebrows)
) ) This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over
) ) "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine."
) )
) ) GO AHEAD (normal eyebrows)
) ) This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care."
) ) You will get a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead" in just a few minutes,
followed
) ) by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five
Minutes"
) ) when she cools off.
) )
) ) LOUD SIGH
) ) This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement
) ) very misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are
an
) ) idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting her time
standing
) ) here and arguing with you over "Nothing."
) )
) ) SOFT SIGH
) ) Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are one of
) ) the few things that some men actually understand. She is content.
Your
) ) best bet is to not move or breathe and she will stay content.
) )
) ) THAT'S OKAY
) ) This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say
to a
) ) man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard
before
) ) paying you retributions for whatever it is that you have done.
"That's
) ) Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction
with a
) ) raised eyebrow "Go Ahead." At some point in the near future when
she
has
) ) plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big
trouble.
) )
) ) PLEASE DO
) ) This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the
) ) chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing
) ) whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell
the
) ) truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay."
) )
) ) THANKS
) ) A woman is thanking you. Do not faint, just say you're welcome.
) )
) ) THANKS A LOT
) ) This is much different from "Thanks.." A woman will say, "Thanks A
Lot"
) ) when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have
hurt
) ) her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh."
Be
) ) careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh", as she will
only
) ) tell you "Nothing."
Posted by: Miss The Girl At: 20, Jul 2002 2:12:56 PM IST
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