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Articles: My Thoughts | Change is welcome, but for a constructive purpose
- Mrs. manjari
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This is again in sequence to my article about adapting to new culture wherein I have expressed my views. I feel good that people appreciate my views. But one of the genuine concerns as expressed by one of the readers is quite understandable.
“Your feelings and concerns are genuine.
But I doubt if anybody will change after reading these kind of articles. In fact, this trend is increasing. “
Yes. I strongly feel that there will be a change in the attitude of people towards life, if they are explained again and again about the pros and cons of deviating from a strong foundation. It may take some time. But a day will come when people who are opting for change or trying to imitate west will realise that “Old is Gold”. There is always good in changing ourselves to become much better Human beings but change just for imitation sake, without realising the outcome will not give ultimate happiness. For example, as you said about a lady getting into relationship with a White and forcing her husband to divorcé her is an example of this so called Modern Woman. A woman is also a human being. But for ages she is known to be more tolerant and more powerful than men, if I am not wrong. Why earth is called Bhumata? Not Bhupita? It can bear anything. They were able to bear anything and shoulder the responsibility of running a home and bringing up children and inculcating values in them, so that they will be good and ideal citizens of the society tomorrow.
If a woman having a family becomes selfish and just thinks about herself and leaves the family, what will happen is we will see more and more orphans in the society. “Your children & MY children are fighting with OUR Children type of families which we mostly see in the West”. The children won’t get proper attention and love, hence the society goes down in its strength from time to time. Here, I am not talking about extreme cases where husband beats up his wife and children or a drunkard who is ignorant of the fact that His wife is also human. In such cases, I don’t think it is proper for a lady to still stick to that guy. Those cases are exceptional.
We are talking about changing husbands or wives just for a change or in crude terms the so called “Variety”. That leads anyone to hell. Because the underlying concept is – If one can not adjust with one person, he can try two, three or any number. But ultimately he will end up being alone in life. I have seen the West that’s what is happening. Before we get into relationships, we should realise the fact that “No two individuals are same. So, since we are tying the knot, we should see that life long it won’t get loose. We should make it a stronger and stronger by our inputs like, wisdom, patience, sincerity, faith and our reasoning power. If there are differences we should try to work out reasons and talk it out with each other, rather than keeping quite and being egoistic. Break the silence and discuss what is the best solution in the interest of the family. Try to make changes. No one is perfect. But by realising our own weaknesses and trying to make a bit of compromise, I think, whether it is a woman or a Man can see that their families won’t break for silly reasons.
I have a friend who is a foreigner. She used to come to my house and appreciate our family life. Initially I thought by telling them about our culture and family concepts, we can bring in some change in them. One day she admitted in our lunch discussion and confided in me. She said “Friend, you give me so much respect and love and give food in your house. You never asked me about my personal life. But I want to tell you that I am not an Angel. I had so many relationships in my life. But when I was in hospital for a health problem for one week, I realised the importance of family life. No one came to see me except my boss from office. I broke my relationship with my partner after five years. The reason was just our interests do not match. I like music and he always goes for horse riding. I left him and now he is married and happy with children”. She is now a frustrated soul seeking happiness nowhere and does not even want to make friends or live a life of contentment.
So, friends, What I want to ultimately tell you is “Please do not imitate West” . I am not saying West is bad. They are used to that. Indians can never become Westerners. So, please try to make our culture more and more strong and contribute your mite to the Western Society and the whole humanity will be happy. Love, compassion, service and understanding will lead us to the Ultimate Goal of life i.e. Self Actualization.
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